BRAIN EGGS

REGARDING THE STATE OF MUSIC TODAY...the chart toppers suck

2011-12-11T12:09:00.003-05:00

My dad Bpops and I were having a discussion today about music...he mentioned Glee,American Idol, etc and how those entities were misguiding people...my response was "yeah, huge corporate entities are devouring music from one end as legitimate ARTISTS are building a levee on the other"(I'm paraphrasing here but you get the point). He responded by saying that he couldn't think of a time in his life that some people didn't bitch about popular music and how some small corner of the music world was better and underrated. He went on to admit that he is a fan of LADY GAGA, acknowledging that alot of her music is genius sometimes obscured by all the artifice and stage-witchery....

I do know that many people in the Augusta area dismissed THE BEATLES out of hand at first blush....technology considered, "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" is not that far removed from "Papparrazzi"...a catchy verse followed by a rock solid hook...it's POP music after all....and truth be told, LADY GAGA is a very skilled musician....

I have two responses to that idea....well, really three because LADY GAGA irritates me with all her bullshit costumes....so number 2-one difference between THE BEATLES in their moptop days and GAGA at any point in her career is THE BEATLES could put their hands to instruments as a UNIT and reproduce their recorded music in a live setting without much of a discernable loss in quality...by and large, LG's music is manufactured by computers(and her stupid outfits are fashioned by demons posing as people who enjoy having a laugh at their client's expense...but i'm quite sure they sell it with flurry of pixie dust,a limp wrist and a "you GO girl, that outfit is utterly FAB-O")...number 3 in my response to Bpops requires a new paragraph because I intend to ramble...

ahem....number 3-with regard to musical talent among the current crop of popular artists charting on Billboard today(less of a REAL measuring stick of musical success than it has EVER been), NONE of them has half the talent(with regard to singing,songwriting, or performance) that is contained within the membership of any number of unsigned bands in THIS town or any other in the U.S. LMFAO has become famous with the most cloying,inane and half-assed attempt at even ATTEMPTING to make something that resembles music...I'm amazed that those idiots can tie their own shoes. JUSTIN BEIBER sings Christmas songs to his "shawty"...and he's WHITE....if only I had a large explosive device I could plant in the midst of the MTV Europe Music Awards show, I'd die a happy drummer.

Now I do realize that the very same year that NIRVANA broke, NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK was a hot act....and I realize that one of the best selling artists this year ADELE is the real deal....what alarms me these days is the absence of rock and roll....the absence of GUITARS....what encourages me is the fact that the guitars have not gone silent, they are still blazing....along with real drums and drummers and vocalists that don't NEED autotune....they have found safe harbor in genres that don't bust the charts under current musical trending(the vast majority of people who proclaim themselves "music lovers" just want to fist pump and dry hump in the club....Gym,Tan,Laundry=giant orange douchebag...)...genres like Americana,Metal,Indie Rock,Punk, etc. have not forgotten the power of that gigantic open E chord....and rarely is the term "shawty" uttered there....

Stak

P.S. who else finds GAGA repulsive?...

WHAT IF THE WORLD WERE TURNED UPSIDE DOWN...chapter one

2011-11-27T18:38:00.003-05:00

I have awakened yet again staring at the stars moving between the branches of leafless trees. Tracking them across the skies for hours before I dare move. I grow weary. For decades my banner men have stomped a steaming shit-filled mud hole out the sorry excuse for an army left of the Roman Empire...what is left of it. Of late, they relentlessly attack the Southern boundaries of Erin with half a horse between them. They are nothing if not redundant and stupid. Our Welsh brothers at bow have to this point put down every charge by half before they reach my infantry. I am forever in Sir Bowen's debt for that. My heavy Calvary has on five occasions finished the job with scarcely a scratch, mowing down the ragged leftovers as though they had offered themselves up to a man a blood sacrifice to my throne. Rumor has it that some of the more base of my legion have had their way with those toothless faces before dining on the flesh of their cheeks.

I have been decisively isolationist in my foreign policy. I could send over air messages to the gargoyles of every single keep in the strongholds of Erin and raise an army of a size to easily swarm all of Briton. The legions could span the channel by locking arms and climbing back over back. I could stroll into Spania and Italia as easily as I stroll through my garden on my best mornings. I have to this point chosen not to do so. Not hard to figure. All of Euros is beset by plague, and has been for twenty years. Their food rots in the ground before they can eat it. Erin has been blessed by good fortune. The strong winds off our shores have staved off plague thanks be to Gods. There has been no reason whatsoever up until now to use my legions for anything other than defense of the realm...

I should be relaxed. I should be raising Hades at the tourneys and bending my Queen over the colors(allowing my Man At Arms to step in in the middle...I am half the man I used to be). Yet my nights are restless...

I could crush all of Euros on a moment's notice...the whole of that sad continent is brought worm level...so sad as to be a joke. Yet with the coming of the Iroquois,Cherokee,Creek and Chickasaw upon the shores of Spania, I feel my hackles rising on behalf of an already besieged countryside. Not that the beloved green flags of my home would EVER be threatened by such orange savages. In fact, I appreciate their seamanship...I just think it'd fun to kill a score of orange dogs. I need a fresh trophy for my mantle. If only I could drag myself out of bed for the event.

The first chapter of a novel yet to be named...

I WISH I COULD SLEEP...

2011-11-25T02:50:00.001-05:00

Were I to be in a band not named JESUP DOLLY....Band Of Horses would be the dream gig...

Stak

LET'S GIVE THIS A GO AGAIN....I return to the personal blog

2011-11-24T18:43:00.002-05:00

I got this new band I'm very fond of...tunes steeped in the Southern story-telling tradition...chock full of outlaws,bad decisions and desperation....it's called JESUP DOLLY and I play drums....

Check the band out at Reverb Nation.....Click Here

I triple dawg dare ya....

Rock it like you actually ROCK IT!

Stak

OFF TOPIC THURSDAY.........dear Gawd! it's a revolution........

2008-06-05T14:48:00.002-05:00

Welcome to Off Topic Thursday..........each week in this space, i choose not to limit myself to the subject of AUG music......so you'll take whatever gruel i hand ya.....and you will LIKE IT...............

At home we have a wonderful relationship with NETFLIX.........between that wonderful service and the library, we never ever have to be bothered with the vast majority of the tripe that is network television.......or any other television for that matter.......the world gets dumber by the minute watching MTV..........

NETFLIX has a wonderful feature called "Watch It Now"........and through that feature a large selection of movies and media are available to watch instantly on your computer..........and since my monitor is bigger than some tv's and gets a better picture than our tv, i use it alot..........

I just watched a documentary via NETFLIX called JESUS CAMP........it is without narration of any kind........it just films these folks as they talk and allows you to form your own conclusions about the subject matter..........i sat mouth agape through most of these proceedings.........it takes the viewer into the world of evangelical christians........more specifically, it shows how their children are trained(read indoctrinated)to become "warriors" in Christ's army....you see they go to summer camp....the brainwashing that proceeds is disturbing enough.........how warped is a kid going to come out if you don't let him make up his own mind?.........but there are several things even more disturbing about this doc...........

These misguided misguiders proceed to involve American politics into the brainwashing process.........it's interesting to see a 10 year old kid spout off about what's wrong with our country...........WTF?..........how on earth does HE know?.......there is even one segment at the KIDS ON FIRE summer camp in Devil's Lake,ND(how's that shit for irony) in which a preacher brings up a life size cardboard cutout of George W. Bush(ptooey) and has the kids pray over it...........IN TONGUES!.........i have never witnessed such horse shit in my life.........and there was that other moment in which a preacher screamed at the kids for an hour about abortion..........and how GW needed to get his Supreme Court justice approved so they could end abortion in America..........these are complex issues and far beyond the understanding of children.........shit, i'm still struggling to understand alot of things.........

The film also included a segment in which a kid named LEVI(imagine that) who harbors notions of becoming a preacher one day spent time talking to Ted Haggard after a service at Haggard's mega-church in Colorado Springs......Haggard tells the kid to "use" the cute kid preacher thing until he's thirty and that by then he will have something worth listening to on its own merit.........the kid looked pissed.......funny..........after the documentary was filmed, Ted Haggard was busted for paying to fuck young men in the ass and doing cocaine.............

You think that's disturbing?..........what about the children's minister who spoke with clear envy about how some muslim kids are raised from an early age to shoot guns, hurl grenades, and strap on dynamite vests in the name of Allah.........this bitch is looking for the same sort of dedication from our kids........kids who will be willing to "lay down their lives for Christ"..........it was kinda funny when this stupid cunt started talking about how Muslim kids are so devout that from the age of 5 they willingly fast through the month of Ramadon(sp?)....and that American Christians should be that devoted..........strange message coming from a cow that only fasts from one McDonald's to the next........

If you believe what these Bible thumping idiots say, then evangelicals are raising up an army to take over the government in this country......and their message of intolerance and cruelty is heading towards you like a Mack truck.......if you're part of the movement, you're okay.......if you're a young man or woman, you're okay........be sure and join the military so you can be a part of the Republican death machine........and if you're a fetus, you okay.....they will protect you..........if you don't fit into those categories.......you're on your own.......

God bless us every one...........Jesus wept..........

See y'all at the rock show.......

Stak

BACK TO BATTLE!...........i need my personal space too!

2008-06-04T14:49:00.003-05:00

Look how big that Aidan has gotten........and if that photograph doesn't give you a clue as to the vibrancy of his personality, then you are blind......as a bat.....fruit bat, whatever.........I've decided to return to this page.......i've spent the last forever working rather hard at a music-centered blog(if you read a few posts down, it'll all become clear).........my music blog does not give me much lee-way to do some of the sillier stuff i was fooling with here.........plus i just like the name of this monkey cage........plus it was way fun to get into my cups and post goofy shit with Trixie late at night(remember the dysfunctional super hero draft?)...........

I don't suppose anyone.......or many.......will read this blog going forward.........guess what..........don't.give.a.fuck.

Rock it like you're in love with your life........

Stak

IT AINT A HOCKEY GAME UNLESS THERE'S BLOOD ON THE ICE!..........

2008-01-15T12:08:00.000-05:00

This is how Russian hockey players get down........i mean this is just plain ridiculous........talk about gang warfare..........sheesh...........

This thing is all over the internet........and for good reason.........just wow...........

Stak

HOLY SHIT...............i love HEART so bad........

2008-01-15T09:57:00.001-05:00

Can't help it.........i just do........

HAPPY HAPPY...........and what not..........

2007-12-25T19:57:00.001-05:00

NEW ADVENTURES IN BLOGDOM.......i'm spreading myself way thin.......

2007-12-18T19:24:00.000-05:00

I've heard it said that in blogging, you need to have a theme and stay dedicated to it......now in my estimation, this is only partly true......sure, lots of folks probably aren't interested in hearing my opinion on sports in my personal blog.......and then there are folks who could care less about the poetry train stuff........but i've gotten great pleasure from having a live diary online where i get to make all the rules.........it's been satisfying to this point........and i will be continuing to do so......thus, you'll forgive me Rhi if a scathing rant against the deceitful behavior of coach Bobby Petrino is forthcoming........you'll get over it...........

HOWEVER.........there is one thing i am most passionate about is music......and having been a member of the small community that is the Augusta,Georgia music scene, i feel strongly about it...........therefore, i've decided to begin documenting the goings on within that scene.........other folks do so on a sort of irregular basis and that's great........but i wanna add my voice.........and on a very regular basis.....and the flexibility of the blogger platform is a dream for folks who used to read fanzines that were written on typewriters and cut and paste together and published with Xerox machines.........

So allow me to welcome anyone who reads this monkeyshines to my new blog.........

CONFEDERATION OF NOISEMAKERS

I hope to offer more than my running commentary in the future.......the staple of this blog will be show reviews,news,album reviews,interviews and any other sorta silly views you might want about music in my hometown..........

I think it's important........

Rock it like your in love with your hometown.......be demonstrative......

Stak

THIS KID OWNS MY HEART.........he is so incredible.....

2007-12-03T00:04:00.000-05:00

THIS THURSDAY NIGHT IMMA MAKE EM BLEED........ears that is.......

2007-12-03T00:01:00.000-05:00

IN PIECES.........my response to a local tragedy....

2007-12-02T23:34:00.000-05:00

A gas station restroom
Is no place to die
One year old
Three years old
Is no time to die
At the hands of your own mother
Is no way to die
She left you in pieces

http://chronicle.augusta.com/stories/120207/met_175193.shtml

My heart absolutely aches for the children of a young,struggling mother who was clearly mentally ill when she exacted a death sentence upon them....and i can't help thinking of my little one.......and that just makes my heart ache more......it's a sad time in my community...........

Rock it like you love your children.......PREVENT harm..........

Stak

SLEEPIN' IN YOUR DRESS BLUES........i'm mailing this one in with a tear or two........

2007-11-19T00:54:00.000-05:00

Jason Isbell recently left THE DRIVE BY TRUCKERS............and he proceeded to write one of the most poignent songs about the war in Iraq i've seen..........i can't sing along with chorus without choking up...........because i can't help putting myself in the shoes of the first person no matter how i try...........and the continued loss of life over there makes me shiver.....do yourself a favor and seek out this music.......i won't include a link......you do the work....

What can you see from your window?
I can't see anything from mine.
Flags on the side of the highway
and scripture on grocery store signs.
Maybe eighteen was too early.
Maybe thirty or forty is too.
Did you get your chance to make peace with the man
before he sent down his angels for you?

Mamas and grandmamas love you
'cause that's all they know how to do.
You never planned on the bombs in the sand
or sleeping in your dress blues.

Your wife said this all would be funny
when you came back home in a week.
You'd turn twenty-two and we'd celebrate you
in a bar or a tent by the creek.
Your baby would just about be here.
Your very last tour would be up
but you won't be back. They're all dressing in black
drinking sweet tea in styrofoam cups.

Mamas and grandmamas love you.
American boys hate to lose.
You never planned on the bombs in the sand
or sleeping in your dress blues.

Now the high school gymnasium's ready,
full of flowers and old legionnaires.
Nobody showed up to protest,
just sniffle and stare.
But there's red, white, and blue in the rafters
and there's silent old men from the corps.
What did they say when they shipped you away
to fight somebody's Hollywood war?

Nobody here could forget you.
You showed us what we had to lose.
You never planned on the bombs in the sand
or sleeping in your dress blues.

No, no you never planned on the bombs in the sand
or sleeping in your dress blues.

DIRTY LEFT HAND TO FILM VIDEO...........news at 11; Stak to miss movie premiere........

2007-11-16T22:08:00.000-05:00

IN LOVE WITH THIS KID............and i love my other kid too, but he's not as cuddly........

2007-11-16T02:16:00.000-05:00

That kid sliding into the door there is Aidan.........he's MY kid........and the depth of my adoration is immeasurable to be certain...........

Tonight when i came in late from band practice, Trixie asked me go in and make sure he was covered up with his blanket.......it's become very cold here over the past day or so............i went into his room and rested my hand upon his back just to feel the rise and fall..........and i spent 10 minutes just feeling this boy breathe.......

It touched me deep down..........again, i cannot express in words how much i love this boy..........my heart overflows.............it overflows............

Stak

ASHES TO ASHES...........somma dat poetry train carras..........

2007-11-11T21:06:00.000-05:00

My girl is entirely unrepentant
"Gimme a light" she says
As she fires up her second filterless
Camel in the past 10 minutes....
Upon the little short table
People insist on associating
With coffee
Lies the overflowing ashtray
Atop a People magazine
With this years' next top model
Cover bare.......
The ashes spill over the edges of the butt-tray
A pile of vile,poisonous shit for a head
With a magnificent pair of tits
I sigh

I notice as she smokes
That the smoke is a beautiful blue
Coming off the end of the cigarette
AZURE
As she exhales
It's a musty brown
As if the lungs of the smoker
Have corrupted the smoke
Despite your pre-conceived notions............
I really don't give a good Gatdamned
What you think of me
And my chain-smoking Molly.......
Nyahhh!!!!!!

Stak

CAN CAN.........i can't bear to watch it...

2007-11-10T14:07:00.001-05:00

Star in Your Own JibJab! It's Free!

EARLY MORNING WARNING..........i'll be playing out in the clubs again soon.........

2007-11-08T01:11:00.001-05:00

Rock it like you're big pimpin'.........color coordinate,bitch...........

Stak

HOLY GAWD!!.........anybody seen Jibjab.com?........here's my movie........

2007-11-08T00:17:00.001-05:00

Star in Your Own JibJab! It's Free!

SUSHI GOOD...........is it lunch time,yet.......pass the saki....

2007-11-07T13:08:00.001-05:00

Tracy has a happy food dance that she does whenever she eats sushi.........

CREEPING GREEN.........poetry train car........

2007-11-05T12:03:00.000-05:00

Progression unchecked
Choking out telephone poles
Trees and brazen plants
Too presumptuous to get out of the way
The South yielded to the unending creep
If only i had a car that runs on Kudzu
I did hear it makes a tasty salad though

Stak

CARNAGE ON CANDYLAND AVE......poetry train car ?......

2007-10-29T12:22:00.000-05:00

The boys at the precinct will never believe
This one
They'll think i'm a loon
Thought Sgt. Goose
Tables turned
The murder scene
The sheer madness of it all
The Wolf(aka Big Bad)lay disemboweled
Trees garnished with his guts
The one section twisted as
Though used for a jump rope
The blood used as paint
Tinting tree bark with images of garnet daisies
Thoughtlessly or brazenly
The evidence left conspicuously clutched in
The right paw of Big Bad
The Little Red Riding Hood

Rock it like the underdog........win anyway!........

Stak

BULLDOG NATION, YOU'RE BIGGEST FEAR AWAITS YOU......time to face The Gators....

2007-10-27T14:38:00.000-05:00

That's Tim Tebow, the quarterback for THE FLORIDA GATORS.......they're crowning him a football god down in Florida at this point......and to be sure, he is as fast as he is big.......a true game breaker........Tebow and THE GATORS await THE GEORGIA BULLDOGS today in a game of unmatched tradition in The SEC......it used to be called The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, but now you have to sneak your bevvies into the stadium at the "neutral" site at Jacksonville........thus preventing riots and such......

My awareness of the importance of this match came in the amazing game in 1980 in which THE DAWGS came back at the last seconds of the game with a miracle pass to LINDSEY SCOTT! LINDSEY SCOTT! LINDSEY SCOTT!...........

THE GATORS have owned THE DAWGS for the past 17 years, winning 15 times in that span.....

Hence, the most important game of the year to this point never fails to make me feel a little queasy........i'm queasy right now.........even though to this point, Georgia sacked Tebow on the first play from scrimmage and picked up a fumble and is now preparing to score first from the 3 yard line..........i should be thrilled.......but i almost can't look.........

I'll update later.........ugh........

Stak

It's 12 minutes into the first quarter and i'm nearly breathless........this is a slug-fest already........and so far, THE DAWGS are on top 14-7......going on top with the first pass of the game, which just happened to be an 80+yard laser to Massaquoi(sp?)........there have been numerous penalties for taunting to this point......THIS GAME IS HEATED......and shows exactly why THE SEC just overpowers the rest of college football in terms of intensity.........more penalties on the ensuing kick-off.......these guys are trying to KILL each other.......
Stak

TWILIGHT BLEEDS.........poetry train car number who knows........

2007-10-15T11:29:00.000-05:00

Edges give way
leaking dark into the light
slowly,surely
it's invaded
enmeshed
and blended
transformed and remade
a new creature
exactly what i intend to do to you.

Stak

THEY BE SCRAMBLED............the eggs i mean.....or what's happenin now...........

2007-10-14T10:22:00.000-05:00

As we suspected all along, the widely advertised death of CAPTAIN AMERICA turned out to be nothing more than a speed bump............he returns early next year.........

THE ATLANTA FALCONS suck better than your team sucks..........the franchise should be hired to suck the soul out of the universe........because they sure are leaving me heartbroken week in and week out............FUCK..........

AIDAN bangs a drum as i type..........and talks boatloads of jibberish.........and runs to and fro like a mad to and fro machine..........

LSU's loss to KENTUCKY last night has me pondering who might end up wearing the National Championship crown this year............the winner may not be an undefeated team this time..........

I've gone back to emergency nursing.............in 6 weeks of work, i haven't been confronted with much in the way of urgency(thank God i don't work at MCG)..........and i've seen my clinical skills coming slowly back up to speed........

JOE GRAVES AND THE DIRTY LEFT HAND is eyelashes away from releasing a new recording...........the new songs are quite good............1965 sounds remarkably like SONIC YOUTH.......................

Keep on sailing that black ship,y'all............

Rock it like a pirate.........take it all and leave nothin'..........

Stak

HOLY FUCK AT THE COMMERCIALS!..........the hits just keep on coming.......

2007-09-29T19:58:00.000-05:00

I'm watching college football tonight and here again i see a commercial with incredible music...........this time it was a Caddillac advert.........and playing in the background was the tune "Stars" by HUM.............who i have loved since that first record...........since when did Madison Ave. get invaded by aging hipsters?............fucking bloody good music........

On a side note.............congrats to Florida St. for kicking the shit out of Bama today.........and i hope to the Good Lord that Washington beats the brakes off of number one ranked USC............oh and thanks to all the other 6 teams that beat the fuck out of top 25 teams today..........yay for upsets.........moves my DAWGS closer to the top!...............

Woohoo!

Stak

THIS ONE'S FOR DUSTY RHODES........more childhood mems.........

2007-09-29T16:42:00.000-05:00

This story bookends nicely with my IMMA CAPTAIN AMERICA story.....a complimentary illustration about the nature of guilt and debt contained within friendships if you will..........although not quite as poignent(sp?)......

When i was in middle school, i had a friend that i hung out with most of the time......he was a really nice guy........he met me at my door each morning and we walked to the bus stop together........

One fall afternoon, we were rough-housing in the front yard.......trying wrestling moves on each other.........we fell together with his weight and mine coming down on my right forearm.........i heard the snap..........the funny thing is........i didn't feel any pain......but i was going into shock almost immediately.......i knew it was broken........my radius had snapped in two places.........and there was a depression below my wrist that shouldn't have been there..........i went into the house to break the bad news to mom............all the while, my friend apologized over and over..........he felt responsible.........

My mom drove me to Doctor's Hospital to be patched up.........i'll never forget the length of the needle they used to numb my arm to be set..........and i'll never forget that they had to inject the medicine into my armpit to achieve the proper nerve block............but my how the warm plaster felt good when they applied the cast.........

My friend allayed his guilt by buying me extra chocolate milks for the entire school year.........he was a cool cat...........

Rock it like you're not afraid to break it..........because that just wouldn't be living..........

Stak

Loose Lips.........poetry train car number whatever......hey y'all, i'm writing again!.......

2007-09-29T16:24:00.000-05:00

Tightrope tension
coupled
with words dealt
with abandon
like playing cards
rending flesh
slice!
bleeds to outcomes
unanticipated
and dear ones
injured
and feeling hurt.

*Art by Jennifer Reed Go Here For More...it's quite good,actually

Stak

IT NEVER FAILS.....................i swear it never does......

2007-09-29T15:42:00.000-05:00

Every single time i eat Waffle House, i end up with heartburn...........oh well......time fors da updates and whatnots..........

I just saw a commercial for some service or product that i don't remember........that's because i was too busy paying attention to the background music..........it was Bob Mould solo material........."See A Little Light" i believe was the name of the tune.........For those who didn't already know, Bob Mould fronted the legendary band HUSKER DU...........and they were part of my awakening.......

Another great day to be a DAWG fan..........lots of folks were saying the game this week was a possible trap game with THE VOLS on the horizon.........guess what.......UGA rolls to a 41-17 victory over Ole Miss as the defense steps up BIG TIME!...........take THAT!..........

Tomorrow, my FALCONS go for their first W of the season.........i'm feeling pretty good about the return of Matt Schaub and THE TEXANS.......THE FALCONS have improved each week and TEXAS is beat to Hell and back with injuries........should make for excellent sunday beer drinking and snack gnoshing over at Joe Graves' house........

The dream job i wrote about earlier turned out to be a nightmare.......it proved to be terribly unstable and they never came through with the benefits package they promised.........i went hunting for a new gig and they fired me when they found out i was looking........shit!.........i haven't been fired from a job since i was 17 years old.........and this scrub ass clusterfuck of an organization decides to get in the first punch.........well the joke is on those assholes.........because i secured another job the next day.........and last week those bozos called me and begged me to come back.......poetic,no?...........so for now, i'm back at the hospital holding down the emergency room........i have to say, it's been really pleasant thus far........

The baby is toddling all over the place.........and he is great......incredibly sweet,playful and spirited........i am enjoying watching him grow......

Rock it like life's good...........because it IS good here......GO DAWGS!.........

Stak

THIS IS ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW TONIGHT.........

2007-09-22T23:40:00.001-05:00

It's a great day to be a DAWG fan................GO DAWGS!.......SIC EM!..........

I'm off to the ATLANTA FALCONS game tomorrow..........God i love football..........

Stak

LYRIC DEVICE..........we're up with GUIDED BY VOICES.....

2007-09-02T03:42:00.000-05:00

Yeah I need to do that, that thing that will dislodge the boulder, the abdominal boulder that starts the landslide. Kickin' the dust off the mountain, terrifying the natives, creating history, burying the mystery, waking up the wilderness, with a roar, a score, a trench, a future waterfall, just a kick, the trick, to get a new thing started

yet i reveal this self.... my self down home......at home......in these country hills.........i can't get away.........it resides wihtin me forever.........or else...........refined though i be.....this part of me.........i'll never escape because i love..........what made me..........

twang revealed for upper carolina thangs..........thankin yo granma for lovin' folks....she cooked and she cared and she shared what she had..........finger pickin' parties and hard work made your dad.....

The country made him hard.....and his name made him strong.........your momma took his heart........of that was born you a song......

All night long.........listening ..........listening.........hoping for the best........worrying for the worst of things.......

All night long............it came to this..........the best of things........

The most beautiful of baby girls the world has ever seen............

Best of all things ever,baby.............Tracy is the best person i've ever met...........

Kudos to David Steele and Vivian for knocking it straight out of the park..........

Love my girl..........

Stak

and her family say.........

So when you comin' home? When you comin' home? You've never lived here... We've all got your name, when you comin' home? You've never lived here... We miss you just the same.

We hold your pride in us being here, we've never left off your name, we hang your beauty on our walls, we miss you just the same.

You're one of us, made of the same clay, you mama moved away, but she took with her our name. You've never lived here, we're savin' you a place, we've always held you near, in our hearts & in our name.
Don't forget your name.

Grandaughter of Cat & Jiggs Steele...

T.R.Ipecac.

THIS MAY JUST BE THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN..........holy shit i'm hungry now.........

2007-08-29T22:57:00.001-05:00

was that shit for real?.......................

Stak

SOUNDING LOUD..................

2007-08-29T15:33:00.001-05:00

Two different posters...........same show................plan on rocking out tomorrow night..........oh and Rhi, i'll have a copy of that compilation cd for you whenever we can arrange for you to pick it up..........i owe you some goodies for the tattoo design.............

Rock it like it's goin out of style.........time's a'wastin..........

Stak

CICADA!!!!!...............

2007-08-28T14:43:00.000-05:00

How many of you have seen a living cicada........oh sure we hear them in the trees all the time when it gets hot out........but for me, the only tangible evidence i've ever seen of these weird bugs has been the husks left over after they've molted.......

This weekend at the lake, we ran into this guy..........fresh out of the ground, he was still caked in clay........he looked like a miniature rhinceros without the horns.....Dylan picked him up off the ground and placed him on a pine tree......his forelegs looked like ice hooks........he promptly began climbing.........

We looked up on the tree a few hours later.........and there was nothing left but a husk, split down the middle.........what a strange creature.........

Stak

CAKE FACE! CAKE FACE!.........Aidan's birthday party.........

2007-08-28T14:35:00.000-05:00

Yep........we gave him his own cake........chocolate with chocolate frosting.......his first time ever tasting cake in fact.......i think he liked it......what do you think?...........afterwards, i just dunked him in the lake...........he had frosting in each ear hole...........

Rock it like a good poppa..........love that kid to death......

Stak

YET ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF SOUTH CAROLINA'S STELLAR EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM......

2007-08-27T11:33:00.000-05:00

Here's Miss Teen South Carolina giving us a Big Brain exhibition............prepare to feel your IQ drop while watching this..........i mean.......GAAAAHHHH!!!!....

Rock it like you've got maps.......locate South Africa and help em dammit....to build up our future.......

Stak

PURE EVIL............i will definitely be having nightmares after seeing this........

2007-08-25T00:16:00.000-05:00

I found these images over at My Confined Space which i highly recommend........if you're wondering why i would go so far as to call that "cute and cuddly" piece of shit pure evil, you'll need to go read this.........that should be all the explanation you'll need....

Have a good weekend all..........i'm going to the lake to have a birthday party for my toddler.....

Stak

BIRTHDAY WISHES.........for one of my favorite persons on this planet........

2007-08-23T17:09:00.000-05:00

Aidan turned one year old today...........Oh my gawd how i love this kid........

Stak

BOOM!

2007-08-22T17:47:00.000-05:00

I have always been in love with severe wheather..........fascinated by it..........

I sat out on the deck today as thunder rolled in surround sound all about me ..........

One strike..........one direct hit......or even an indirect hit..........and you are literally Toast.............

I thought about that one and done scenario............

Rock it like you're living with no fear..........DARE the lightning.......

Stak

DOES ROCK COUNT ON MONDAY NIGHT?........i don't know but imma find out.........

2007-08-20T12:30:00.000-05:00

WHILE WE'RE ON WILL FERRELL..........dear baby Jesus...........

2007-08-18T15:52:00.000-05:00

I CAN TURN INVISIBLE.........if i really try hard.........

2007-08-18T15:38:00.001-05:00

JUST BECAUSE IT BEARS REPEATING..........put yo junk it dat box........

2007-08-18T15:12:00.000-05:00

FOR YOUR EDIFICATION............the rhymenoceros........the hiphopopotomus..........

2007-08-18T15:07:00.000-05:00

DEATH METAL...........it's the shit.......no really......it's shit..........

2007-08-18T15:06:00.000-05:00

THE WINDSOCK OF DOOM..........or a guide to making your bandmates puke while riding in the tour van..........

2007-08-17T21:16:00.000-05:00

The photo above is yet another step back in time for me........that's a band i played in back in the days when i had hair..........hair that wasn't growing on my knuckles or my back..........pre-bald gorilla days if you will..........at any rate, that's MARY JANE JONES..........the other fine fellows in the band are Dave Newhall who played bass, Rob Bernier who played guitar, and his brother Todd Bernier who also played guitar.........

Tonight i wanna talk about Todd.........specifically his behavior on the road.........now Todd or "Tippy" as we called him had standards that were a bit different from most folks......let's just say he was comfortable letting his hygiene go way past the point that most reasonable human beings would be sprinting for the shower......and a manicure.......and a sandblaster........

Try going on the road for weeks on end with someone like that...........i triple fucking dawg dare you............my apologies for the breech of dare etiquette........

There was one long trip MJJ took out to the midwest and back........it was a happy time.......we played a record label showcase and gots lots of interest from the VIRGIN records A&R guy............on the trip back Tippy struck.......it was the coup de grace.......we had been practically living out of a van for 2 weeks........Tippy had not changed his underwear or socks ONCE during that entire time span........and it was summer time too..........whilst driving through the OZARK mountains, Tippy took one of his socks off........and okay that was bad.........but what he proceeded to do next will be ingrained in my olfactory nerves for eternity..........he........he.........he........

excuse me for a second........i can hardly bring myself to commit these words to blogdom.............*sniffle*...........

he opened up the side window on the van..........then he proceeded to lift this sock........which for all intents and purposes was a living eco-system of funk......as the sock began to take wind, it became the putrid death wind sock of the apocalypse............the stench of two weeks of foot funk permeated every last molecule of air in the van............

we had to pull over...............

now i've been scared before.......but i have never felt like i was standing at the edge and staring over it into the abyss........until i smelled "the wind sock of doom"..........i hope to never endure such torture again.........

at least it was a rental van............and thank Almighty Jesus.......he used his sock instead of his drawers...........

Rock it like you've lived well..........enjoy your memories......even the stinky ones..........

Stak

TWO TIDBITS.............found wordplay for the Poetry Train.......

2007-08-13T09:34:00.000-05:00

Blurb #1

She smelled like nicotine
Stained fingers
Stained teeth
Stained soul

Blurb #2

Your words caress my teeth
I crunch them in my mouth
The syllables are sweet
The curses they are foul

Stak

MAN VS. WILD.............and we didn't leave the set and sleep at the MOTEL 6..........

2007-08-11T01:33:00.000-05:00

This is a photo of a vista at Devil's Fork State Park........it's on Lake Jocassee in the northwestern corner of South Carolina...........me and Trix and Aidan camped there last weekend.........it was beautiful............the water was so blue..........-S

It was a nice campground, although if you're camping in a tent you're haulin' all your stuff from a parking lot down a path to your site. For you backpackers, you can call me a pussy, I'm a total "car camper". Plus with a baby, there's more shit required. Once we were set up all was fine. My friend E-man came to join us, he had spent some time up there & was a fine guide. We went to a couple stroller friendly waterfalls, & up to a town called Highland where we got great Italian sandwiches & a $10 accordian. We went swimming in the blue water, had a lazy day, & sat out a rain storm in our bathing suits. I'd definately do it again. - T.

Certainly, pros and cons all around........but the landscape was beautiful.............and we like camping................

Stak

THE LOCAL MUSICAL FAMILY TREE..........this will probably only make sense to me...........

2007-08-10T04:30:00.000-05:00

I have had the luxury and honor to be both a participant and observer of the evolution of music in my hometown of Augusta,Georgia..........the picture you see above was taken at SQUEAKY'S TIP TOP..........an Augusta landmark that was once described in GQ magazine by the members of a New York band called Lotion as "a tool shed with a bar on the side"..........they made the remark in the most loving way possible..........because most every band that came to SQUEAKY'S loved it.........Jay Aston from the 80's band GENE LOVES JEZEBEL calls SQUEAKY'S a friend to this day.........for a good long run, it was the oldest functioning bar in Augusta...........for pete's sake, DWIGHT D. EISENHOWER came there for a burger and a beer after a round of golf at the AUGUSTA NATIONAL............

The picture at the head of this post was taken in the late 80's.......obscured behind the cymbals and drums is yours truly.........it was around the time that THE TIP TOP began having live entertainment..........that's my band NEATO TORPEDO.........waaaaaaayyyy back in the day..........the bands set up in the back of the bar at that time.........seeing that pic puts me in a nostalgic mood........so imma run down some of the bands from Augusta that either inspired me,blew my mind.........or of course the ones i played a part in...........(dig my dangle,Bpops).............

i'll start with a band that fueled my curiosity and desire to play music.........My dad's band THE PALLBEARERS............they billed themselves as "the last ones to let you down"..........and they made a name for themselves playing the frat circuit all over the southeast............i was not present for their career..........however........the memorabelia(sp?) i got to see, belied how big time these cats were.........they played white boy soul.........and they released records on two separate label imprints..........they rode the then very influential top 40 of WBBQ for many many weeks just prior to my birth...........and the music kicked ass.............

flash foward 15 or so years to the mid 80's...........as a teenager, i became aware of a burgeoning scene of cats that were doing the whole DIY thing and building the foundation of our music "scene"............

John Brownlee impressed me very early on as a sort of impressario.....he played bass with a band called THE FUNGOES...........and he brought bands from out of town to play Augusta............they held the shows in a practice space above a chinese laundry on 8th street downtown.........there was always a keg..........and the shows always got busted..........but it was cool as shit to me as a teenager........THE FUNGOES later became THE OUTLINES............and it was good.......

there were other bands sharing that practice space..........one prominent band was THE CRAWLING PEGS...........who's members later went on to form BLAH............

around this time, i helped found NEATO TORPEDO.............along side us, several great bands were forming...........taking our cues from the variety of great stuff we were discovering by bands from labels like SST and all the DUTCH EAST INDIA TRADING COMPANY stuff.........FUCKSTICK turned into PAINTED TAMBOURINE......which evolved into SWIMMING GROUND............the boys from TIN SOLDIER eventually joined forces with DAVID BRADBERRY from STAN'S BIKE and ORPAN TRAIN to form DEBT OF NATURE(one of this town's all time greats)........

i joined DEBT OF NATURE upon leaving NEATO............DON dissolved into SMILE.........after SMILE, Dave Newhall and I formed MARY JANE JONES...........and so on and so forth.........up to now..........

in the middle of that span of time, there were other great Augusta bands such as DESOLATE JAMES,BURNING BUSH,JAMESGATE,PINE.........and how do you forget HUNDRED YEAR SUN..............

the list, the history and the chronology are by no means complete.........but the point is this..........this town has produced great original music for more than 20 years now..............

i'm proud to have been involved in whatever small capacity..........

Rock it like your next artistic endeavor may in some small way make history........lay that shit down with the most passion you can muster...........

Stak

THE BOOTS OF EVIL WERE MADE FOR WALKING........keep your vulgar monies..........

2007-08-09T10:40:00.000-05:00

All hail E-bay..............thanks to that glorious creation, we procured a DVD copy of season one of THE TICK.........remember............HE IS MIIIIGGGHHHTTTYYY.........seriously great stuff..........

Other stuff..............JOE GRAVES AND THE DIRTY LEFT HAND has several shows coming up......one of them NOT being 12 Bands of Favoritism.............ahem.........more on that later............

Looking forward to a miserable season by my FALCONS............AND my BULLDOGS...........

Baby Aidan turns one year old on the 23rd............i can't really express what a joy it has been having him around thus far...........the work is a pleasure....i have to admit that Trixie does most of the heavy lifting.........and believe me.........the kid is HEAVY...........here's hoping this is the first birthday in a string of a hundred in a long happy life.........

Apologies for the lack of posts lately............i've been otherwise occupied.........

Stak

HOW'S BOUT MY RECONCILIATION WITH MY FATHER...the rest of you just look on,yo........

2007-07-26T01:21:00.000-05:00

I can never express to you all............how much my dad means to me..........he has been there for me when i was lost at sea worrying how to be a man sometimes......he was there for me sometimes when i had no idea which way to go.............i gotta give props to Bpops...............that cat knows what time it is...

INDEED...............props to Bpops............

Stak

JINGLE WHAT!?!?!..........JINGLE WHAT!?!?!?.....jingle all the where?!?!?..........

2007-07-25T18:18:00.000-05:00

Okay.............so my internets name has been dragged into the media spotlight by the local free weekly paper based upon a debate i was involved in on a local bar's message board........the issue at hand was the selection process for 12 BANDS OF CHRISTMAS which is a wildly popular Augusta charity recording and concert for the Children's Medical Center here...........i was beaten down at every turn during said debate even while i espoused views that i know for a FACT many other local musicians share..........they are afraid to speak them aloud...........and i just can't figure out who's getting the beat down in this article.......it seems to be written with an agenda.........but i can't prove that............it could be that it has simply succeeded in making me look small...........i'm not sure about that.........it CERTAINLY does not contain many key points that were brought up over the course of a few weeks of argument............you can read the article for yourself..........for now, i reserve further comment...........until the dust settles.........messages have been sent to the pertinent parties by myself and i need to wait a bit for their responses............but it's coming...........and hey GATDAMMIT, i'm blogging again..........

And heeeeeeere's the link!!!

Damn..........i've become famous for being a befouler of sacred lambs........COOL!..........

Stak

POSSIBILITIES..............how some pit bulls might bring the future to ATLANTA........

2007-07-21T10:23:00.000-05:00

If you had asked me even as late as 3 weeks ago, i would've told you that the likeliehood of DJ SHOCKLEY ever being anything more than a career backup in the NFL was slim to none..........with MIKE VICK'S indictment things have changed quite a bit........it's more than likely that JOEY HARRINGTON will perform to the best of his ability(which equals sucking like a Hoover)..........COACH PETRINO appears to be a no nonsense, go for the throat type of competitor, and as such seems unlikely to allow JOEYBALL to stink up the field for more than a quarter and a half..........

ENTER DJ...........call me a homer, but i believe starting SHOCKLEY under center would be healing for the franchise, the city and the state.........especially if he kicks ass............i have nothing but respect for a guy who sat on the bench behind DAVID GREENE for all but one year of his college career........he could've chosen to go to another school and likely would've started most anywhere he went.......but he was LOYAL...........and he waited and waited and waited......then he took THE GEORGIA BULLDOGS to the SEC CHAMPIONSHIP............

call me silly, but i want more than anything right now to see DJ SHOCKLEY starting the entire season at QB for THE ATLANTA FALCONS............win,lose or draw........get the guy some snaps..........he could be great one day.........THE ATLANTA FALCONS season is already in the toilet.........or should i say "gone to the dogs"......

Rock it like a fan of the game.........talk about football, not fucking PETA..........

Stak

SHIT!!!.........FUCK!!!........DAMNITT!!!............and other dirty words.............

2007-07-17T20:11:00.000-05:00

So now the word comes down after months of feverish,sweaty speculation by ESPN and it's mooky hordes of half retarded talk show hosts (read=too ugly for TV commentary)........Michael Vick has been indicted in what is essentially an interstate gambling racket.........at least, that's what the Feds are interested in..........the rest of the country is more pre-occupied with the brutality of the organized dog fighting aspect of the indictment........i could argue all day long about priorities(some folks would take the life of a DOG over the life of a child......and that brings up a whole other set of arguments, because i'm fairly certain that more children die at the hands of their own parents than dogs at the hands of organized dog fighters.........BUT BUT BUT.......that doesn't excuse the actions of organized dog fighters.........misplaced priorities is all i'm saying).........but the bottom line is this...........FUCK "OOKIE"!!!..........SHIT MAN!!!..........finally,finally, finally the possible line up of talent needed to contend with THE FALCONS and your dumbass gets busted for this retarded shit!!!........WHAT!?!!.........126MILLION wasn't enough for you?!?!?!..........if you're guilty of this, you're more than just dumb(as you've been accused of being over and over in the "sports press").......you are RETARDED...........JOEY MOTHER FUCKING HARRINGTON?!?!?!?...............FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK................

Fuck

Stak

BACK AND FORTH............Trixie and Stak.................

2007-07-08T05:43:00.000-05:00

Okay..........Trixie and I are feeling especially in love with each other.............so we're gonna go back and forth.........excuse the cheesey love fest...........

Stak: You are my complement........completing another is not the issue........it's more about how your grooves fit mine....perfectly i'd say........

Trixie: I've grown, I've grown to live up to myself, you've helped me to see so. You're the thing I've been looking for without knowing it. You're the climax to my shibang. I found out who I was then I met you. AND YOU LIKED IT. I liked you, from the get go. ALL BE DAMNED.
All cliches realized. All the things I thought people were stupid for. I wouldn't trade it for the world. On a tray,filled with independent wealth. I'll take whatever I get with you by my side. Along with the fact that you love the friends that made me who you love. I'm thankful for the people that made you the person I can't do without. True love that includes all of us. When we fell in love we extended the coolest network ever. I've found my match....You're the best!!!!!!!!

Stak: I miss those love letters that i received at work on almost a daily basis........this is as good...........and although this may be self indulgent, i believe this outpouring of adoration is healthy in spite of what onlookers may think........did i tell you how brilliant i think you are,Tracy?........did i mention how much i admire your artistic mind?..........did i mention how much i think you rip shit up in THE DIRTY LEFT HAND?.............well i think of you in nothing but glowing terms..........i blow up with pride every time i set foot in public with you........and i can barely contain myself when i set foot onstage with you............let's always pledge our loyalty to each other.........oh wait.......we already did.......we married each other.........

Aint love grand..........

Stak

STAK AND TRIXIE.............poetique.............

2007-07-04T01:44:00.000-05:00

First line stak: Lovelorn,forlorn British bitten goathead shearshorn

Line two Trixie: Hospice, forgotten, a piece torn for friendship born

Third line stak: Bread broken, carriage upturned, friends truly duly worn

Fourth line Trixie: Strangers be, tried & treed accepted customs queezily

Fifth line stak: Gourge refused from gullet full, forced forth upon sidewalk

Sixth line Trixie: Walk Walk & keep on walking remember this when you talk.

There there now..................

Here's how it plays out without the play by play........

Lovelorn,forlorn British bitten goathead shearshorn
Hospice, forgotten, a piece torn for friendship born
Bread broken, carriage upturned, friends truly duly worn
Strangers be, tried & treed accepted customs queezily
Gourge refused from gullet full, forced forth upon sidewalk
Walk Walk & keep on walking remember this when you talk.

There ya go.................rock it like you have some command of the English language...........make poems,yo..........

Stak

THIS WEEKEND I ROCK!!!!...........

2007-07-02T22:36:00.000-05:00

Rock it like you've got incredible taste in live music..........come see my band this Saturday night!!..........

Stak

GOD BLESS LARRY MUNSON.........and God bless them Dawgs too........

2007-06-29T16:09:00.000-05:00

The news this week was that long time GEORGIA BULLDOG football play by play guy,Larry Munson will not be travelling to away games this season.........and the rumor is that this may be his final season.......if it is, the final home game will be a sad day for DAWG fans.........he has been calling games since i was a child and is regarded as one of the best in the business..........when GEORGIA games are televised, folks here turn down the volume on the TV and tune LARRY in on the radio...........word is that he is in poor health...........well God Bless You,Larry Munson..........our love affair with you doesn't end this season...........

ME AND TRIXIE FORWARD DRUNK POST MACH DEUCE........dysfunctional superhero draft.........

2007-06-28T22:58:00.000-05:00

Heh.......my favorite line from SPACEGHOST COAST TO COAST.........courtesy of ZORAK........"that nanny needs a lozenge".......that said, me and Trix have decided to post a dysfunctional superhero draft..........if you were gonna have a fucked up superhero team, who would you have?...............pick number one goes to me because i rule here...........feel free to post your draft picks in the comments section.......wait for at least one additional comment before posting your next pick........and i guarantee you my retard superheroes will out fuck up yours........

With the 1st pick of the dysfunctional superhero draft, i pick ..........

SPACEGHOST.........Trixie's on the clock.......tick tick tick.........

I'm goin' with SWAMP THING one of the greatest movies of the 80's, first off if you chop anything off it grows back! Lorraina Bobbitt do your worst. Then the hideous lovable guy always touches me in that special place...uhh Brian you're the 1st.

Uhhhhh.......riiiiggghhhht,Trix............for my next pick, imma have to take THE TICK...........so far i've countered your regenerative unit with 2 brutish retards......plus THE TICK comes with a side kick who's a pussy...........dysfunctionally, you're super retard team's ass is grass......plus, SPACEGHOST likes GINO VINELLI..........extra points for me for my team's shit taste in music...........heh...........your pick,virgin...........

Okay this one's personal. WONDER WOMAN. I loved WONDER WOMAN when I was a kid cause everyone knows that when you play WONDER WOMAN you spin around to change from Linda Carter into WONDER WOMAN. I really loved spinning around untill I was too dizzy to stand up. It looks like both Linda & I grew out of spinning & took on heavy drinking. I still feel like WONDER WOMAN when I'm too dizzy to stand up......... for Stak's sake.

Stak's on the clock.....tick tick tick...........

Okay, you've clearly upped the ante,bitch........that WONDER WOMAN pick was straight up a groin shot, being as she's not really all that dysfunctional....except for the fact that Linda Carter is equal to you in the drunk department...........so i've gotta play smart here.......for my next retarded dysfunctional super hero team pick, i select....................tick tick tick........wait for it.........

THE BURGER KING!!!............that's right bitches!!!........i totally saw this badass murder RONALD MCDONALD...........the blood was straight ketchup..........top THAT...............this time, if you're gonna pick a chick, make it a drunk slut like LINDSAY LOHAN...............the clock is now ticking for Trixie..........tick tick tick.........

Alright, this one's for Troma, I was gonna go for the obvious Toxic Avenger. Since he's really a goodie goodie at heart & the only dysfunctional thing is that he works for Troma it doesn't really count. So, my pick to show my love for the Troma is
SGT. KABUKI MAN NYPD. Rough around the edges and kicks ass in a dress, yep its Harry whatshisname for me.

Aiight.........Aiiight.......that pick only strengthens your team.......but i got a counter for your shits............imma have to take TRASH GORDON from SESAME STREET fame.........he would be the only motherfucker on my team with the sense to take the pebble out of his shoe on the planet of retards with pebbles in their shoes.....plus he knows how to pick up the phone when it's ringing.......top THAT bitch!!!!............my team is done........the rest is up to you......

The clock is now ticking for Trixie........look for a blockbuster trade offer from Rhian any moment now..........

I WANTED TRASH!!!!!!!! I WANTED TRASH!!!!!!!!! SUPER GROVER WOULD CRASH INTO YOUR TRASH GORDON THEN GIVE HIS BROKEN DOWN ASS A PEANUT BUTTER & JELLY SANDWHICH!!!!!!!!!

Okay, now that I've finished my hissyfit, counted back from ten & taken a deep breath........ THUNDAR THE BARBARIAN is my next pick, that shit about SUPER GROVER was just to make a point, an angry point. THUNDAR THE BARBARIAN is the blue print for HE-MAN. He also took direction from HAN SOLO with his non-vocalizing animalistic side-kick. I'll give a nickel to anyone who remembers that guys name. THUNDAR fought foes beyond his time does anyone know was that the past or the future? Did the Moon crash into the Earth or something? Anyway ripped thighs & a mighty big sword & a pet who can watch your back. What else needs to be said?

Well fuck...........there you have it..........two of the most retarded superhero teams in the history of retardation.........and i think it might be our best drunk collaboration in the history of retards posting on the internets...........can your stupid hero teams top ours?..........i fucking strongly doubt it,bitches.........but bring it if you got the guts...........the retard hero league of fucked-uppedness will begin competition this fall to coincide with the start of the NFL season(that's for those of you with a decided lack of interest in the greatest game conceived by man).........who know's........maybe we can sell the rights to ESPN..............

give us your picks............

Stak

THIS IS A MIGHTY MIGHTY JERSEY......this 8 will eat you...........snicker

2007-06-28T10:42:00.000-05:00

I saw this over at With Leather and just had to share it here.......prepare for hilarity because this guy is clearly living in Loo Loo Land.......beware anyone you see wearing a Detroit Lions jersey on the street.......clearly, they are mighty and will smite you with the number 8...........i'm a hopeless Atlanta Falcons fan, but i'm not nearly as deluded as this wingnut......i would never post vids on Youtube proclaiming Mike Vick as a "Touchdown Assasin".........which is worse, a D&D obsessed geekazoid or a Detroit Lions fan?........well, this guy is obviously both.........have a good laugh,folks.........it's on this idiot.......

Rock it like a fan with some sense......wait for your team to put together a winning season before you go around warning the entire NFL of your teams dominance.....sheesh......

Stak

APPARENTLY, MY ASS ROCKS...........is that a good thing?......

2007-06-26T18:30:00.000-05:00

The fact that this tag used to say "girl" in the middle is not lost on me...........i'm kind of amused by it..........however, i would like to take this oppurtunity to thank
Rhian as well as the Academy for this honor........even if i did have to show my ass to get it...........

Rock it like a meteorologist.......Rock it like a hurricaine........

Stak

SYMBIOTES...............poetry train car number whatever.........

2007-06-25T11:07:00.000-05:00

their destinies forever entwined
the opium poppies
stare dreamily into the night sky
seeing the faces of future junkies
in the rolling clouds
content in the knowledge
that they will meet again soon

Stak

WEEK ONE of MY WEEKLY POWER RANKINGS........a new feature......

2007-06-22T15:34:00.000-05:00

Each year, sports journalists engage in the sometimes laughable practice of putting each of the NFL teams in order from greatest to least....the team in the top spot is supposedly the team that will eventually become the Superbowl champion at the end of the season....they call these lists power rankings...the rankings change weekly based on performance.......usually, the teams at the top and the bottom can be agreed upon by most folks.......but things get murky in the middle.........and despite the fact that these lists are absolutely meaningless......sports retards will argue these rankings endlessly throughout the season........actually, they argue about them all year round......it's still 3 months away from the start of the NFL season and these nimrod sports "journalists" are already posting power rankings.......i'm itching for the beginning of football season as much as any average joe, but gatdamm!!!...........

That said, i decided to post some meaningless "Power Rankings" of my own......what follows is a list of things that i think are kick ass(i know, i know it's a blog device...but i've been word-dead lately so it's time to break out of the funk)........

1. MILLER LITE-coming in strong at the top of the pile is my drink of choice.......and it's quantity,not quality bitches.....truth be told, were i posting power rankings for about the past 5 years, Less Filling and Great Taste would've been champion the entire time........extra points for purposeful misspelling......

2. JOE GRAVES AND THE DIRTY LEFT HAND-i play drums in this band.....we rock well.......we got a show at THE FIREHOUSE tomorrow night......you should come to it.......

3. AMERICAN SKIN-my other band......serious ROCK for that ass......the only reason AMSKIN is ranked below THE DLH is because we're in a rebuilding year......

4. SEX-no explanation needed....

5. GUITAR HERO II-This ridiculously fun video game is really nothing more than an advanced version of the game SIMON(remember that one)...except that you get to strap on a fake plastic guitar to play it.........it has recently come under harsh criticism by insecure guitar teachers everywhere.........fuck those guys, this game is a hoot and a half.........

6. MEXICAN RESTAURANTS ON SUNDAY-i live in the Bible Belt and we have so-called "blue laws" which are set forth to force the values of a bunch of Bible thumping fucktards on the rest of us normal people......so you can't buy beer here on Sunday.......but the Mexican Restaurants are open on Sunday......and they never run out of beer..........plus burritos are mighty tasty.......

7. PORN-9 out 10 guys who aren't total douchebags agree.......porn is good for the soul......

8. SILVERSUN PICKUPS- i recently acquired a copy of their latest cd called CARNAVASE.....do yourself a favor and go out and buy it.....seriously good, dreamy shit........the leader sounds like the guy from GRANDADDY..........and that's not too shabby....

9. THE VIEW FROM MY SEATS- i got tickets to the first regular season FALCONS home game against THE PANTHERS on Sept. 23rd.......fuck yes!!!!......i cannot wait.....

and finally.........

10. TOBLERONE- thank Allah for impulse buys in the checkout line at TARGET....chocolate never tasted so good........

There you have it, my week one power rankings.........feel free to discuss or post your own..........these are subject to change on a weekly basis, but i'm willing to bet that some form of beer will remain at number one for a long time to come......or at least until i'm attending AA meetings on a more regular basis........

Rock it like you're getting back on the horse........show no fear.......

Stak

HAPPY BIRFDAY TO TRIXIEIPECAC!!!..........we had great dinner.....

2007-06-19T16:55:00.000-05:00

Would look at that?!!!.........She got the cake, but i think i got the real present in this equation.......We went out to Bistro 491.......can you say posh.......indeed it was posh and expensive......but a real treat......

Stak

SOME R&R CULTURE FOR DAT ASS!!!!!............come see me rock

2007-06-13T16:22:00.000-05:00

DUALISM.............me and trixie forward drunk post number one.......

2007-06-09T00:17:00.000-05:00

Trixie says she loves Billy Connely's scottish accent..............forward fast to the fact that we just convened JOE GRAVES AND THE DIRTY LEFT HAND practice.........and we are fucking PLASTERED............i mean our gills are plastered to the side of our necks(did i mention the fact that we're both sea monsters?)..............at any rate, late night tv is prompting us to "get zwinky" right now...............in the face of that, i'm extra retarded............that given, imma turn it over to someone with some sense.........Trixie?............

I like a scottish accent because I'm a fan of the Red Dwarf series. Heard of it? Its you're run of the mill step up from Dr Who & Hitch-hikers guide to the galaxy. As far as gills go....I only thrashed around with that thing in the black lagoon once & as far as I know gills aren't contagious are they??? Maybe I was just drunk & he had really dry skin, maybe it was some wanna be surfer from the isle of palms.....the windjammer was jammin' though.........

Rock it like Trixie got this shit under control........allow yr chick to blog when you've lost all touch with reality...........think i'll have another beer.......

Stak

Post script.........she rocks don't she..............

THRASHER'S GROCERY............an account of a trip into Normaltown,GA..............

2007-06-08T22:37:00.000-05:00

The irony of the name given to Normaltown(a small suburban section of Athens,Georgia) is not lost on me...............i have the experience to prove it.........and it's one fucking weird experience...........i cherish it to this day...........

Back in the early 90's, i was actively pursuing music with the intent of conquering the world(news at 11, that shit aint never gonna happen).........i was living in Augusta back then.........however, i had joined a band of Augusta expatriates living in Athens called DEBT OF NATURE.........an extremely psychedelic band, DON was given to partaking in the sorts of substances a band of that nature got all giddy over and what not...........long story short..........after a full night of reveling in the majesty of weirdo music on the stereo(i'm sure DINOSAUR JR's album YOU'RE LIVING ALL OVER ME and a viewing of PINK FLOYD live at Pompei were involved) we decided to visit THRASHER'S GROCERY in Normaltown...........it was 7am at this point and breakfast was in order.........and as i was informed, THRASHER'S served a mean biscuit............

This supposed grocery was set in the middle of a neighborhood of shotgun houses, rundown and with multiple broken down cars and trucks a requirement on the lawns.......as we walked in, i noticed a kid sitting on the porch of the neighboring house.........he was a dead ringer for the banjo playing mongoloid in DELIVERANCE..........stepping into this place, i realized it was a grocery store in name only...........the shelves were lined with industrial sized jars of mustard and pickles...........not much else...........but there was a glass meat counter.........behind the counter, was a woman with no teeth and a mole the size of Alaska with a hair the length of the Alaskan pipeline jutting jauntily from said mole.........keep in mind,i'm completely fucked up here on powerful psychedelics.........i thought i'd stepped into an alternate universe.........this woman took our orders for bacon,egg and cheese biscuits........she passed the orders through a window to the kitchen to a hairless lady with an equal tooth deficit.......they passed out the biscuits through the window of toothless ladies........the biscuits were the size of dinner plates and delicious..........

The kicker came when the DELIVERANCE kid came in from next door...........he walked up the meat counter(this is 7:30am mind you)..........he had a paper grocery sack in his hands..........he promptly states to the mole lady..........."pounda lard"........she regards him briefly, recahes into the meatcase and pulls out a white chunk of animal fat and replies........."pounda lard".........she reaches over the meatcase and drops the animal fat into the sack........transaction completed, DELIVERANCE boy walks out of the "grocery"...........

My mind=completely fucked............

That a was fun experience...........i enjoyed the biscuit.........

Rock it like you can appreciate the odd...........eat the whole fucking gigantic biscuit.......

Stak

BLOCK!.................dammit............

2007-05-30T21:46:00.000-05:00

I got a mean case of blogger's block(how fucking gay is that?!).........nothing to see here..........move along dammit!!!...........

Stak

TOUGH GOING...............poetry train car number six...........

2007-05-28T23:14:00.000-05:00

We dive into this with intentions questioned
Certain of our desire to make things right
Uncertain of the path we choose
But deeply in love
With one another
Wanting the best possible future
Wanting everything
For this romance
And the ones we love
Around us
Hard decisions
Do they breed content
or contempt
I pray with all my prayer molecules
For the former

Stak

THE MIDNIGHT RADIO GIVES ME CHILLS............incredible use of music in film..........

2007-05-24T22:32:00.000-05:00

HEDWIG AND THE ANGRY INCH is one of my favorite films all time.........it doesn't hurt that it's a cohesive statement start to finish that incorporates incredible music and animation to tell the story.........and it doesn't hurt that the story is exceptional..........and i don't care if it's Gay-centric........or gender identity focused...............it just kicks ass..........just enjoy The Midnight Radio........because this is one of the many songs on the soundtrack of this film that should've been a top 40 smash hit..........simply put, this and other songs from this film ROCK.............

Just fucking rock it.............

Stak

LONGING..............poetry train car number five i think....

2007-05-21T11:56:00.001-05:00

Awakened from sleep
feeling the pull
you are my gravity
I ache for you when you are away
I long for your proximity
When in the space between our bodies
The air grows small fingers
Conduits for the adoration
We share for each other
You are my complement

Rock it like you're in love......write sappy poetry for your mate..........

Stak

WICKED SCEPTOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2007-05-16T10:32:00.001-05:00

FUN WITH TOILET..........busted.......

2007-05-15T13:44:00.000-05:00

MY CUP IS ALWAYS FULL..........poetry train car number four...........

2007-05-14T20:08:00.000-05:00

I am a vessel
I am also an agent
Trying to cram it all into the vessel
Life abundant to the point of overflow
Not a moment un-lived
Not a door un-opened
Not a flavor worth tasting
Un-tasted
I am a conduit
I am also electric
Trying to electrify the pathway
Nerves bridging gaps too wide to span
Not an impulse un-heeded
Not a thought un-tumbled
Innervating errogenous zones once
Un-feeling

Rock it like time is limited...........Carpe Diem!............

Stak

THE WAR............dirt clod armageddon............

2007-05-12T10:21:00.000-05:00

Some of my most memorable childhood moments come from the period of time when i was between the ages of 6 and 9.......it was a more innocent time(never thought i'd hear myself say that about the 70's)and i was given alot of freedom to roam the neighborhood.......especially during the summer....i spent alot of time in my back yard anyway........it was a big back yard.........it wasn't fenced.........it was separated from the backyard of the adjoining house by a shallow ditch.......

One summer day, we brewed up a war..........the kids from the next street over versus me, my sister, Hank(you remember him from the Captain America post,right?), and few other kids from neighboring houses.......it was the dirt clod fight to end all dirt clod fights.........they rained from the sky and exploded on impact.......at some point, i found myself out of position,dirt clods exploding off of the small pine tree i was using for cover.....i decided to retreat for better cover......i turned to run..........this is where one of the future sociopaths on the opposing army chose his spot.......ignoring all the rules and regulations of dirtclod wars(ie. no throwing rocks,etc.)this assmonkey threw a brick.............it hit me flush on the back at the shoulderblade......i wasn't wearing a shirt........it left a perfectly brick-shaped abrasion on my back, including the 3 holes down the center......it hurt like a sonuvabitch........i ran into the house crying........

Mom promptly put an abrupt end to the dirtclod war........

Rock it like a battle wounded veteran......tell your kids to request cover fire before you retreat.........

Stak

GREECE IS THE WORD...............or why i'm positively green right about now.....

2007-05-11T17:55:00.000-05:00

Bpops(or my dad to you guys)is on a 2 weeks+ vacation in Greece right now........they sent me this picture..........meanwhile i'm driving around in a pickup truck with no AC,sweating my ass off...........i cannot begin to tell you how jealous i am.........but haha, he'll be broke until this time next year.......i told them to be careful with the National drink of Greece, Ouzo.........if you drink enough, you'll see visions.............i hope Dad brings me back a big bottle of the stuff as a present..........it's the least the guy could do,right?..........plus i'm up for a vision or two............preferably one in which my clothes don't stick to me................

Rock it like it's hot........blow it a little before consumption......

Stak

THE DESCENT..........a rolling commentary............

2007-05-07T23:08:00.000-05:00

Tonight i'm watching THE DESCENT.................i enjoyed the revenge flick HOSTEL....if you're not familiar with the plot of HOSTEL, it's kinda like the great American vacation version of SAW in Europe......with discos.............in this flick, they've reversed the field a bit by having a bunch of cave divers,who happen to be chick Europeans tackling caves in THE APPALACHIANS in the southeastern mountains of America...........GUESS WHO'S gonna win THIS FIGHT..............i have learned thrill seeking friends who're part hippie/part punk/part metal-head who regularly dive caves in the southeast..............to a man they each give the caves around here a metric ton more respect...........the caves here are SCARY dangerous all by themselves........and that's without the possibility of crazy cave mutant monsters..........that's all i'm sayin.........

How come none of these Brit bitches have any liquor?.........they're gonna NEED it............and how come they keep losing their accents?...........and when's the last time you saw a gang of chicks dive a cave?...........shit never happens..........

Their reticence at the beginning of the actual descent tells me all i need to know..........if you announce "Oh my God, I'm gonna die" at the beginning of the flick, you're officially FUCKED..............

RULE NO. 2 of cave diving.........if you're scared out of your panties by a cloud of bats..............YOU'RE OFFICIALLY FUCKED.............

and why in the fuck would anyone believe a group of all girls would dive a cave?..........i'm not sexist, i'm just sayin'.............

yep, they're fucked..........this is fun............

i gotta pee..........break time............somehow i'm thinking this movie is gonna kick ass despite some very obvious flaws.........the best B horror flicks always do.......

the question now is.........which bitch will be the first one to die.............

somehow i think this chick that's squirreled into a hole is gonna find the first dead body.........

"Sarah you have to calm down......just breathe"...........

"It hasn't got a name(the cave system), it's a new system"..........these chicks are fucked..........this is great...........welcome to the real underbelly of the South,folks..........

showin their grit now...........realizing the "gravity" of the situation now........using those rock climbing skills to traverse a gap.........holy shit,these girls are fucked.......bet they wished they had one of my cave diver friends with them right now............

inuries now..........yep, they're fucked.......they're finding old gear from other climbers.......welcome to THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE...........

imma quit blogging now...........the outcome is not worth the payoff......watch the movie............

Stak

MUSE...........one of my favorite musical discoveries of the past few years...

2007-05-07T19:57:00.000-05:00

Enjoy this............these guys are remarkable...........

Stak

EARTHY CRUST............poetry train car number three.......

2007-05-07T14:59:00.000-05:00

You crumble in my direction
like a leper
pachouli stink pouring off you
like a poisonous cloud
locks of dread
a glut of months of your own oils and funk
you like to set them on fire
it's your best party trick
"haaaaaay maaaaaannn......you got any rolling papers?"
I want to wash your face in my vomit
an improvement i think

For the record, i'm in some ways hippie-like........and my wife is a total hippie......this poem is a sort of imagined disdain toward earth children..........

Stak

IS BOXING A REAL SPORT?............i don't care either way.....

2007-05-04T23:13:00.000-05:00

The last time i saw Oscar De La Hoya fight it was against Mayorga(another figher of mexican decent).........it was great because Mayorga called Oscar a faggot in the weeks running up to the fight........i watched the pay per view bill with a room full of 23 Mexicans.........the only thing Mexicans like more than boxing is soccer(explain THAT shit to me).......so it was a spirited evening to say the least........i spit all the tequila shots they gave me into the nearest potted plant.........i'm sure the plant was fucked up...........i know this because he leaned over and vomited about a shovel-sized amount of potting soil onto the rug at the end of the night...........at any rate, i earned the mexicans' disdain after the first fight on the undercard..........i won the betting pool.........i think i heard the words "gringo puta" whispered betwixt them for at least the next 2 fights.........it was great to watch De La Hoya take the guy who'd called him a faggot and make him into mincemeat pie(note to self-do not EVER question the manhood of a Latino World Champion Fighter).......the Mexicans loved it.......apparently, nobody but Mexicans from Mayorga's hometown give a shit for Mayorga's antics.......in my view, it made for good drama.............

My prediction for this fight is De La Hoya gets his face re-arranged by Floyd.........The Golden Boy likes to take at least half of each round off.........and Floyd hasn't called him a faggot.........YET.........

Rock it like it's not football season yet..........grab your sporting events where you can get em............

Stak

SERIOUSLY BATSHIT..........a dispatch from "The Prophet".........i'm not making this up.........

2007-05-04T22:48:00.000-05:00

I went to visit the "I wanna be a prophet of God, like Moses" guy today...........i left with a letter for your edification...........The Prophet asks for your prayers so he can achieve his goal............AND i quote............

"Jehovah is great, and the laws of Jehovah must be enforce. I encourage teh theocratic government of Israel to enforce these laws. As the prophet of the nation of Israel I ask for your support. As the prophet of the nation of Israel I thank you for your support. As the prophet of the nation of Israel I want your support. Call xxx xxx-xxxx for more information."

Please send this guy some honeybuns............preferably unwrapped so he can offer them up in sacrifice to Jehovah............

I LOVE MY JOB.....................

Stak

RUNNING WITH WHAT EXACTLY???????????........

2007-05-01T21:25:00.000-05:00

Has anyone seen this movie?.................i understand mental illness..........but i was struck by the mom character played by Annette Benning in this movie.........the character is a classic example of Borderline Personality Disorder..........in laymen's terms it's more succinctly put by the term "Drama Queen"............Borderline folks irritate the shit out of me............they are overwhelmingly women............and they were more than likely made to be the way they are by their own mothers...........i hate that shit..............

i would like an objective take on this particular joint by some other folks............especially those who've read the book upon which this film is based...........because i'm guessing the book was a sincere attempt at a memoir...........and i'm guessing the movie rendition has retarded the original artistic statement considerably..........just my gut feeling...........

Stak

TATTOO CONTEST..........uncontested, but we have a winner!!!..........

2007-05-01T07:45:00.000-05:00

Feast your eyes upon that,folks!!.........impressive,no?..........That entry was the only entry to my Design My Next Tattoo contest......of course, it was submitted by
Rhian......I am very much blown away by it.........So Rhi,sweetie, you win a DIRTY LEFT HAND T-shirt,the old CD SAME OLD FOIBLES and the new cd TAKE MY HAND AND WE'LL BEAT THEM TOGETHER as soon as it comes out(very soon)and some other things(buttons,stickers etc.)......i think i may have to add some other goodies as well because your work is just so damned cool...........YOU ROCK RHI!!!!!...........THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!

Stak

SNOOZE BAR APOCALYPSE.........poetry train car number two.......

2007-04-30T16:43:00.000-05:00

I exist in this limbo.......nerves jangled by the alarm clock
snooze button having been depressed a third time
drifting through strange epic flights of lunacy
not quite asleep
not awake either.......in between
i slide into the dream fully aware that i'm dreaming
a long journey to the shore ensues
water provided along the way by familiar strangers
i reach the coast and join a church raising party
the ladies give up before the work is done
in the Bible i seem to recall a foretelling of the faithful
giving up on the church in the end days
i stand by in amazement as the beach is flooded with screams
as the creatures of the ocean begin to devour the swimmers
blood stew
then as tidal waves crash upon the shore
fires blaze through california
and countless starlets are crushed under the earthquake decay
the alarm clock rings again

Stak

DEADLINE APPROACHING............gimme gimme gimme....

2007-04-29T15:34:00.000-05:00

Well.........tomorrow is the deadline for my "Design My Tattoo" contest.............i have no interest to this point and it's almost zero hour........i can only make assumptions............oh well........*hangs head and walks away*...........

Stak

THIS BLOG'S FOR YOU COCK-NOSE......hosing down a complete moron...........

2007-04-29T08:47:00.000-05:00

An open letter to COLLIN COWHERD of ESPN radio:

You secretly want to take MICHAEL VICK into your arms and gently caress his man-meat,don't you?........it could be the only explanation for the excessive amount of attention you pay to him on a daily basis.......this in the very midst of the NFL DRAFT(read real news you fucktard)..........why else would you report speculation as fact and then compare someone to a pedophile as a result?...........i HATE you and i sincerely hope that Michael Vick sues you for slander............because you would lose, you slanderous idiot...................FUCK OFF AND DIE!!!!!!!!

Signed,
Your Mother

There...........i feel better............have a happy Sunday, y'all..........

Stak

A PUBIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT..........for your own protection.........

2007-04-26T00:02:00.000-05:00

Are you having to put on eye glasses to read this?.........take your other hand off your junk,yo!............

THURSDAY THIRTEEN.........or how i figured out Rhi is a con artist......

2007-04-25T22:49:00.000-05:00

These are things i hate...........

1. Memes

2. Blog Devices

3. Your Momma

4. An empty beer box

5. Memes......did i say that already?.........it bears saying again......

6. Rosy O'Donnell

7. Spoons

8. Squirrels

9. Memes

10. Dirty dishes

11. Laundry

12. Corporate radio

13. Memes

I promise i'll make a real blog later within this 24 hour period............

Rock it like.........aww fuck it..........

Stak

PLOT HOLES THE SIZE OF MARS............i watched flightplan tonight..........

2007-04-24T21:38:00.000-05:00

Ummmmmmmm............excuse me..........if you happen to be flying home on an international flight...........and everyone in authority is telling you that both your husband and daughter died jumping off a building..........and you're delusional because you thought you got on the plane with your still living daughter............why in the hell are you riding on the plane with ONE coffin...........fatal plot flaw...........that's all i'm sayin..........

Rock it like you're not Hollywood's "suspension of disbelief"..........think as you watch..........

Stak

COMING EVENTS...............

2007-04-24T14:52:00.000-05:00

I'm looking forward to sharing the stage with OTITIS.......they're MCG students.......their name is medical speak for ear infection....pretty clever,no?..........They have a very new alt. sound ala MODEST MOUSE............APOSABLE SCUM is heavily informed by SONIC YOUTH.........should be an excellent show..........

Rock it like you're with the band..........be IN the band.......

Stak

A LOVE LETTER TO MY TRIXIE........my car on the poetry train........

2007-04-23T12:47:00.000-05:00

Click on the photo to enlarge it.......

Rock it like you're in love.......do it with passion....

Stak

SO I VISITED THE MOSES GUY AGAIN..........honey bun of the weird........

2007-04-22T12:34:00.000-05:00

I dropped in on the "i wanna be a prophet of God,like Moses" guy again on friday........on the floor there sat a Nike shoebox with a unopened honey bun on top of it.........i asked why he had a honeybun sitting on a shoebox........he said "i'm sacrificing that honey bun to Jehovah".........he went on to say "i wanna be a prophet of God" and i said "like Moses"........as i was getting ready to leave, i asked him if he had eaten lunch yet.......he replied "not yet, i'm bout to eat that honey bun,though"..........

Rock it like a prophet.........eat the sacrifices........

Stak

Addendum: Rhi is having some sort of poetry monday thing and i thought i might share a little something.........so be prepared to have your soul racked with pain as a result of reading my sublimely shitty verses..........heh heh....

HATE SPEECH HAS NO PLACE AT RYAN CLARK'S FUNERAL........

2007-04-19T16:45:00.000-05:00

Ryan Clark is young man from my area who was one of the first murdered at VA. TECH when that disturbed individual went on his shooting spree monday......by all accounts, he was an upstanding fellow who managed a 4.0 GPA and was to graduate with a triple major in a month or so........his poor family, how devastated they must feel.....there have been lots of tears shed on the news as he was very well liked.........my community is grieving his loss........the funeral is this weekend, and reportedly about 100 members of The Hokie marching band are making the trip here for it.........

Someone else is also planning to make the trip as well........the sick and twisted members of the cult that calls itself the WESTBORO BAPTIST CHURCH.....they attend the funerals of war dead and carry sick,insensitive picket signs stating things like "Pray for more dead soldiers" and "God hates fags"........in fact, that's their website URL www.godhatesfags.com.......just unbelievable that someone could get it that twisted........and the more i think about it, the more angry i get that these loons are bringing their poisonous hatred to my backyard............check them out on wikipedia, it's eye-opening........

Rock it like you just might lead a counter protest....don't let the loons win....

Stak

PARENTING QUESTION.........degrees of pressure......

2007-04-18T22:15:00.000-05:00

Baby Aidan is crawling like a madman now...........at the last doctor visit he sits above the 95th percentile for length and weight........he is already demonstrating a strength of will,intelligence and good nature that lead me to believe that one day he might be an exceptional athlete............in my life i have had regrets having not even tried more organized sports.......i never even played organized baseball once............i wish i had..........my junior high defensive football coach was an ex-professional baseball player...........he played for the CINCY REDS........he told me at the end of my 7th grade football season that he wanted me to play 2nd base for him based solely on my athleticism on the football field..........i never tried out..........because i'd never had the oppurtunity to play baseball........

Is it too much to believe that i may have a sports star in the making?............how much pressure amounts to being the equivalent of a stage door parent?.............

Rock it like hope..........

Stak

WELL OF COURSE............Mudd wins............i love my dog.....

2007-04-14T15:43:00.000-05:00

MUDD VS. THE SERPENT............hog nose snakes should stay away from my house.......

2007-04-14T14:29:00.000-05:00

BLOG ISOLATION..........no blog is an island.........

2007-04-14T13:29:00.000-05:00

Okay, i know the fucking rules here...........i do realize that one must read and comment to be read and commented upon.........but i think i may be afflicted with some weird blogger disease.......i am the anti-blogger.........all of those silly things that bloggers do the generate traffic, i have zero stomach for(enjoy the my dangling participle you fucks)........i HATE HATE HATE memes..........i don't wanna play the game............take your blog devices and shove them up your considerably gigantic ass,blogosphere...........

To this point, i have absolutely ZERO entrants in my "design my new tattoo" contest(i know, that's kind of a blog device,right..........well so what......i reserve the right to repeatedly contradict myself.....and imma use it.......it feels great).........i was looking forward to the responses to that........however, i forgot the fact that i only have something like 5 readers.........makes contests sorta moot...........

I thought posting my bare ass on the internets for the entire world to see would generate some interest..........so far, only my wife stares at it.........

I suppose i should be thankful for the high quality of individual that reads my drivel on a regular basis............truly some fine folks...........but my vanity won't let me............*grumble*

Stak

WELCOME BACK TO REALLY WEIRD..........i gotta new job..........

2007-04-12T17:53:00.000-05:00

As some of you may know, i work with the mentally ill..........for the past 3 and a half years or so, i've been working with children.....mentally ill children are one thing.........ADULTS with mental illness are a whole 'nother circus.......on my new job i'm working with adults........i would suppose there are few fields of work more colorful.......

Today,i went around to meet some of the patients i'll be working with........myself and my team leader visited their homes.........i knew i was in for a ride when we pulled up to the door of the first patient's apartment in the projects........a sign on the door boldly proclaimed "DISCIPLE OF MOSES"........i thought to myself "Holy shit!!! This is the projects!! I could get shot!! Where do they keep the crack and marijuana? Where are all the crack hos i've heard so much about? I wonder if I could get a gat here on the down low and cheap. Nice sign".........over the course of an hour long visit, this patient proclaimed "I wanna be a prophet of God,like Moses" approximately 647 times(it was his pat response to every question we posed).........it got to the point that i was finishing his catch phrase for him.........he would say "I wanna be a prophet of God" and i would butt in "like Moses"..........it was fun..........i don't think he liked me stealing his thunder like that........he asked me to read a Bible verse.......i politely declined stating that it was my personal policy never to mix business and fiction....he looked at me quizzically and said "I wanna be a prophet of God".........i finished his catch phrase for him.........

The next patient proclaimed that the reason she always has unsafe sex is because rubbers dry her out down there.........she's almost 60 years old.......and a grandma to boot....i didn't wanna hear about that stuff.......imagine your grandma showing up at the health department to get some treatment for a wicked case of the clap........i know,right..........

At the final visit of the day, the patient told me i look like a Greek God......i knew he was bullshitting..........i only look like that on GOOD days.........

Rock it like your job will never be boring.......be kind to the beloved lunatics in your life..........

Stak

NO TITLE NECESSARY............commentary either.........

2007-04-11T18:10:00.000-05:00

BRAIN EGGS

REGARDING THE STATE OF MUSIC TODAY...the chart toppers suck

WHAT IF THE WORLD WERE TURNED UPSIDE DOWN...chapter one

I WISH I COULD SLEEP...

LET'S GIVE THIS A GO AGAIN....I return to the personal blog

OFF TOPIC THURSDAY.........dear Gawd! it's a revolution........

BACK TO BATTLE!...........i need my personal space too!

IT AINT A HOCKEY GAME UNLESS THERE'S BLOOD ON THE ICE!..........

HOLY SHIT...............i love HEART so bad........

HAPPY HAPPY...........and what not..........

NEW ADVENTURES IN BLOGDOM.......i'm spreading myself way thin.......

THIS KID OWNS MY HEART.........he is so incredible.....

THIS THURSDAY NIGHT IMMA MAKE EM BLEED........ears that is.......

IN PIECES.........my response to a local tragedy....

SLEEPIN' IN YOUR DRESS BLUES........i'm mailing this one in with a tear or two........

DIRTY LEFT HAND TO FILM VIDEO...........news at 11; Stak to miss movie premiere........

IN LOVE WITH THIS KID............and i love my other kid too, but he's not as cuddly........

ASHES TO ASHES...........somma dat poetry train carras..........

CAN CAN.........i can't bear to watch it...

EARLY MORNING WARNING..........i'll be playing out in the clubs again soon.........

HOLY GAWD!!.........anybody seen Jibjab.com?........here's my movie........

SUSHI GOOD...........is it lunch time,yet.......pass the saki....

CREEPING GREEN.........poetry train car........

CARNAGE ON CANDYLAND AVE......poetry train car ?......

BULLDOG NATION, YOU'RE BIGGEST FEAR AWAITS YOU......time to face The Gators....

TWILIGHT BLEEDS.........poetry train car number who knows........

THEY BE SCRAMBLED............the eggs i mean.....or what's happenin now...........

HOLY FUCK AT THE COMMERCIALS!..........the hits just keep on coming.......

THIS ONE'S FOR DUSTY RHODES........more childhood mems.........

Loose Lips.........poetry train car number whatever......hey y'all, i'm writing again!.......

IT NEVER FAILS.....................i swear it never does......

THIS IS ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW TONIGHT.........

LYRIC DEVICE..........we're up with GUIDED BY VOICES.....

THIS MAY JUST BE THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN..........holy shit i'm hungry now.........

SOUNDING LOUD..................

CICADA!!!!!...............

CAKE FACE! CAKE FACE!.........Aidan's birthday party.........

YET ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF SOUTH CAROLINA'S STELLAR EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM......

PURE EVIL............i will definitely be having nightmares after seeing this........

BIRTHDAY WISHES.........for one of my favorite persons on this planet........

BOOM!

DOES ROCK COUNT ON MONDAY NIGHT?........i don't know but imma find out.........

WHILE WE'RE ON WILL FERRELL..........dear baby Jesus...........

I CAN TURN INVISIBLE.........if i really try hard.........

JUST BECAUSE IT BEARS REPEATING..........put yo junk it dat box........

FOR YOUR EDIFICATION............the rhymenoceros........the hiphopopotomus..........

DEATH METAL...........it's the shit.......no really......it's shit..........

THE WINDSOCK OF DOOM..........or a guide to making your bandmates puke while riding in the tour van..........

TWO TIDBITS.............found wordplay for the Poetry Train.......

MAN VS. WILD.............and we didn't leave the set and sleep at the MOTEL 6..........

THE LOCAL MUSICAL FAMILY TREE..........this will probably only make sense to me...........

THE BOOTS OF EVIL WERE MADE FOR WALKING........keep your vulgar monies..........

HOW'S BOUT MY RECONCILIATION WITH MY FATHER...the rest of you just look on,yo........

JINGLE WHAT!?!?!..........JINGLE WHAT!?!?!?.....jingle all the where?!?!?..........

POSSIBILITIES..............how some pit bulls might bring the future to ATLANTA........

SHIT!!!.........FUCK!!!........DAMNITT!!!............and other dirty words.............

BACK AND FORTH............Trixie and Stak.................

STAK AND TRIXIE.............poetique.............

THIS WEEKEND I ROCK!!!!...........

GOD BLESS LARRY MUNSON.........and God bless them Dawgs too........

ME AND TRIXIE FORWARD DRUNK POST MACH DEUCE........dysfunctional superhero draft.........

THIS IS A MIGHTY MIGHTY JERSEY......this 8 will eat you...........*snicker*

APPARENTLY, MY ASS ROCKS...........is that a good thing?......

SYMBIOTES...............poetry train car number whatever.........

WEEK ONE of MY WEEKLY POWER RANKINGS........a new feature......

HAPPY BIRFDAY TO TRIXIEIPECAC!!!..........we had great dinner.....

SOME R&R CULTURE FOR DAT ASS!!!!!............come see me rock

DUALISM.............me and trixie forward drunk post number one.......

THRASHER'S GROCERY............an account of a trip into Normaltown,GA..............

BLOCK!.................dammit............

TOUGH GOING...............poetry train car number six...........

THE MIDNIGHT RADIO GIVES ME CHILLS............incredible use of music in film..........

LONGING..............poetry train car number five i think....

WICKED SCEPTOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUN WITH TOILET..........busted.......

MY CUP IS ALWAYS FULL..........poetry train car number four...........

THE WAR............dirt clod armageddon............

GREECE IS THE WORD...............or why i'm positively green right about now.....

THE DESCENT..........a rolling commentary............

MUSE...........one of my favorite musical discoveries of the past few years...

THIS IS A MIGHTY MIGHTY JERSEY......this 8 will eat you...........snicker