HAPPY HAPPY...........and what not..........

NEW ADVENTURES IN BLOGDOM.......i'm spreading myself way thin.......

I've heard it said that in blogging, you need to have a theme and stay dedicated to it......now in my estimation, this is only partly true......sure, lots of folks probably aren't interested in hearing my opinion on sports in my personal blog.......and then there are folks who could care less about the poetry train stuff........but i've gotten great pleasure from having a live diary online where i get to make all the rules.........it's been satisfying to this point........and i will be continuing to do so......thus, you'll forgive me Rhi if a scathing rant against the deceitful behavior of coach Bobby Petrino is forthcoming........you'll get over it...........

HOWEVER.........there is one thing i am most passionate about is music......and having been a member of the small community that is the Augusta,Georgia music scene, i feel strongly about it...........therefore, i've decided to begin documenting the goings on within that scene.........other folks do so on a sort of irregular basis and that's great........but i wanna add my voice.........and on a very regular basis.....and the flexibility of the blogger platform is a dream for folks who used to read fanzines that were written on typewriters and cut and paste together and published with Xerox machines.........

So allow me to welcome anyone who reads this monkeyshines to my new blog.........


CONFEDERATION OF NOISEMAKERS


I hope to offer more than my running commentary in the future.......the staple of this blog will be show reviews,news,album reviews,interviews and any other sorta silly views you might want about music in my hometown..........

I think it's important........


Rock it like your in love with your hometown.......be demonstrative......

Stak

THIS KID OWNS MY HEART.........he is so incredible.....

THIS THURSDAY NIGHT IMMA MAKE EM BLEED........ears that is.......

IN PIECES.........my response to a local tragedy....

A gas station restroom
Is no place to die
One year old
Three years old
Is no time to die
At the hands of your own mother
Is no way to die
She left you in pieces

http://chronicle.augusta.com/stories/120207/met_175193.shtml

My heart absolutely aches for the children of a young,struggling mother who was clearly mentally ill when she exacted a death sentence upon them....and i can't help thinking of my little one.......and that just makes my heart ache more......it's a sad time in my community...........




Rock it like you love your children.......PREVENT harm..........

Stak

SLEEPIN' IN YOUR DRESS BLUES........i'm mailing this one in with a tear or two........

Jason Isbell recently left THE DRIVE BY TRUCKERS............and he proceeded to write one of the most poignent songs about the war in Iraq i've seen..........i can't sing along with chorus without choking up...........because i can't help putting myself in the shoes of the first person no matter how i try...........and the continued loss of life over there makes me shiver.....do yourself a favor and seek out this music.......i won't include a link......you do the work....



What can you see from your window?
I can't see anything from mine.
Flags on the side of the highway
and scripture on grocery store signs.
Maybe eighteen was too early.
Maybe thirty or forty is too.
Did you get your chance to make peace with the man
before he sent down his angels for you?

Mamas and grandmamas love you
'cause that's all they know how to do.
You never planned on the bombs in the sand
or sleeping in your dress blues.

Your wife said this all would be funny
when you came back home in a week.
You'd turn twenty-two and we'd celebrate you
in a bar or a tent by the creek.
Your baby would just about be here.
Your very last tour would be up
but you won't be back. They're all dressing in black
drinking sweet tea in styrofoam cups.

Mamas and grandmamas love you.
American boys hate to lose.
You never planned on the bombs in the sand
or sleeping in your dress blues.

Now the high school gymnasium's ready,
full of flowers and old legionnaires.
Nobody showed up to protest,
just sniffle and stare.
But there's red, white, and blue in the rafters
and there's silent old men from the corps.
What did they say when they shipped you away
to fight somebody's Hollywood war?

Nobody here could forget you.
You showed us what we had to lose.
You never planned on the bombs in the sand
or sleeping in your dress blues.

No, no you never planned on the bombs in the sand
or sleeping in your dress blues.

DIRTY LEFT HAND TO FILM VIDEO...........news at 11; Stak to miss movie premiere........

IN LOVE WITH THIS KID............and i love my other kid too, but he's not as cuddly........

That kid sliding into the door there is Aidan.........he's MY kid........and the depth of my adoration is immeasurable to be certain...........

Tonight when i came in late from band practice, Trixie asked me go in and make sure he was covered up with his blanket.......it's become very cold here over the past day or so............i went into his room and rested my hand upon his back just to feel the rise and fall..........and i spent 10 minutes just feeling this boy breathe.......

It touched me deep down..........again, i cannot express in words how much i love this boy..........my heart overflows.............it overflows............

Stak

ASHES TO ASHES...........somma dat poetry train carras..........

My girl is entirely unrepentant
"Gimme a light" she says
As she fires up her second filterless
Camel in the past 10 minutes....
Upon the little short table
People insist on associating
With coffee
Lies the overflowing ashtray
Atop a People magazine
With this years' next top model
Cover bare.......
The ashes spill over the edges of the butt-tray
A pile of vile,poisonous shit for a head
With a magnificent pair of tits
I sigh

I notice as she smokes
That the smoke is a beautiful blue
Coming off the end of the cigarette
AZURE
As she exhales
It's a musty brown
As if the lungs of the smoker
Have corrupted the smoke
Despite your pre-conceived notions............
I really don't give a good Gatdamned
What you think of me
And my chain-smoking Molly.......
Nyahhh!!!!!!

Stak

CAN CAN.........i can't bear to watch it...

Star in Your Own JibJab! It's Free!

EARLY MORNING WARNING..........i'll be playing out in the clubs again soon.........

Rock it like you're big pimpin'.........color coordinate,bitch...........

Stak

HOLY GAWD!!.........anybody seen Jibjab.com?........here's my movie........

Star in Your Own JibJab! It's Free!

SUSHI GOOD...........is it lunch time,yet.......pass the saki....

Tracy has a happy food dance that she does whenever she eats sushi.........

CREEPING GREEN.........poetry train car........

Progression unchecked
Choking out telephone poles
Trees and brazen plants
Too presumptuous to get out of the way
The South yielded to the unending creep
If only i had a car that runs on Kudzu
I did hear it makes a tasty salad though


Stak

CARNAGE ON CANDYLAND AVE......poetry train car ?......

The boys at the precinct will never believe
This one
They'll think i'm a loon
Thought Sgt. Goose
Tables turned
The murder scene
The sheer madness of it all
The Wolf(aka Big Bad)lay disemboweled
Trees garnished with his guts
The one section twisted as
Though used for a jump rope
The blood used as paint
Tinting tree bark with images of garnet daisies
Thoughtlessly or brazenly
The evidence left conspicuously clutched in
The right paw of Big Bad
The Little Red Riding Hood




Rock it like the underdog........win anyway!........

Stak

BULLDOG NATION, YOU'RE BIGGEST FEAR AWAITS YOU......time to face The Gators....

That's Tim Tebow, the quarterback for THE FLORIDA GATORS.......they're crowning him a football god down in Florida at this point......and to be sure, he is as fast as he is big.......a true game breaker........Tebow and THE GATORS await THE GEORGIA BULLDOGS today in a game of unmatched tradition in The SEC......it used to be called The World's Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party, but now you have to sneak your bevvies into the stadium at the "neutral" site at Jacksonville........thus preventing riots and such......

My awareness of the importance of this match came in the amazing game in 1980 in which THE DAWGS came back at the last seconds of the game with a miracle pass to LINDSEY SCOTT! LINDSEY SCOTT! LINDSEY SCOTT!...........

THE GATORS have owned THE DAWGS for the past 17 years, winning 15 times in that span.....

Hence, the most important game of the year to this point never fails to make me feel a little queasy........i'm queasy right now.........even though to this point, Georgia sacked Tebow on the first play from scrimmage and picked up a fumble and is now preparing to score first from the 3 yard line..........i should be thrilled.......but i almost can't look.........

I'll update later.........ugh........

Stak

It's 12 minutes into the first quarter and i'm nearly breathless........this is a slug-fest already........and so far, THE DAWGS are on top 14-7......going on top with the first pass of the game, which just happened to be an 80+yard laser to Massaquoi(sp?)........there have been numerous penalties for taunting to this point......THIS GAME IS HEATED......and shows exactly why THE SEC just overpowers the rest of college football in terms of intensity.........more penalties on the ensuing kick-off.......these guys are trying to KILL each other.......
Stak

TWILIGHT BLEEDS.........poetry train car number who knows........

Edges give way
leaking dark into the light
slowly,surely
it's invaded
enmeshed
and blended
transformed and remade
a new creature
exactly what i intend to do to you.


Stak

THEY BE SCRAMBLED............the eggs i mean.....or what's happenin now...........

As we suspected all along, the widely advertised death of CAPTAIN AMERICA turned out to be nothing more than a speed bump............he returns early next year.........

THE ATLANTA FALCONS suck better than your team sucks..........the franchise should be hired to suck the soul out of the universe........because they sure are leaving me heartbroken week in and week out............FUCK..........

AIDAN bangs a drum as i type..........and talks boatloads of jibberish.........and runs to and fro like a mad to and fro machine..........

LSU's loss to KENTUCKY last night has me pondering who might end up wearing the National Championship crown this year............the winner may not be an undefeated team this time..........

I've gone back to emergency nursing.............in 6 weeks of work, i haven't been confronted with much in the way of urgency(thank God i don't work at MCG)..........and i've seen my clinical skills coming slowly back up to speed........

JOE GRAVES AND THE DIRTY LEFT HAND is eyelashes away from releasing a new recording...........the new songs are quite good............1965 sounds remarkably like SONIC YOUTH.......................

Keep on sailing that black ship,y'all............




Rock it like a pirate.........take it all and leave nothin'..........

Stak

HOLY FUCK AT THE COMMERCIALS!..........the hits just keep on coming.......

I'm watching college football tonight and here again i see a commercial with incredible music...........this time it was a Caddillac advert.........and playing in the background was the tune "Stars" by HUM.............who i have loved since that first record...........since when did Madison Ave. get invaded by aging hipsters?............fucking bloody good music........

On a side note.............congrats to Florida St. for kicking the shit out of Bama today.........and i hope to the Good Lord that Washington beats the brakes off of number one ranked USC............oh and thanks to all the other 6 teams that beat the fuck out of top 25 teams today..........yay for upsets.........moves my DAWGS closer to the top!...............

Woohoo!

Stak

THIS ONE'S FOR DUSTY RHODES........more childhood mems.........

This story bookends nicely with my IMMA CAPTAIN AMERICA story.....a complimentary illustration about the nature of guilt and debt contained within friendships if you will..........although not quite as poignent(sp?)......

When i was in middle school, i had a friend that i hung out with most of the time......he was a really nice guy........he met me at my door each morning and we walked to the bus stop together........

One fall afternoon, we were rough-housing in the front yard.......trying wrestling moves on each other.........we fell together with his weight and mine coming down on my right forearm.........i heard the snap..........the funny thing is........i didn't feel any pain......but i was going into shock almost immediately.......i knew it was broken........my radius had snapped in two places.........and there was a depression below my wrist that shouldn't have been there..........i went into the house to break the bad news to mom............all the while, my friend apologized over and over..........he felt responsible.........

My mom drove me to Doctor's Hospital to be patched up.........i'll never forget the length of the needle they used to numb my arm to be set..........and i'll never forget that they had to inject the medicine into my armpit to achieve the proper nerve block............but my how the warm plaster felt good when they applied the cast.........

My friend allayed his guilt by buying me extra chocolate milks for the entire school year.........he was a cool cat...........



Rock it like you're not afraid to break it..........because that just wouldn't be living..........

Stak

Loose Lips.........poetry train car number whatever......hey y'all, i'm writing again!.......

Tightrope tension
coupled
with words dealt
with abandon
like playing cards
rending flesh
slice!
bleeds to outcomes
unanticipated
and dear ones
injured
and feeling hurt.

*Art by Jennifer Reed Go Here For More...it's quite good,actually


Stak

IT NEVER FAILS.....................i swear it never does......

Every single time i eat Waffle House, i end up with heartburn...........oh well......time fors da updates and whatnots..........

I just saw a commercial for some service or product that i don't remember........that's because i was too busy paying attention to the background music..........it was Bob Mould solo material........."See A Little Light" i believe was the name of the tune.........For those who didn't already know, Bob Mould fronted the legendary band HUSKER DU...........and they were part of my awakening.......

Another great day to be a DAWG fan..........lots of folks were saying the game this week was a possible trap game with THE VOLS on the horizon.........guess what.......UGA rolls to a 41-17 victory over Ole Miss as the defense steps up BIG TIME!...........take THAT!..........

Tomorrow, my FALCONS go for their first W of the season.........i'm feeling pretty good about the return of Matt Schaub and THE TEXANS.......THE FALCONS have improved each week and TEXAS is beat to Hell and back with injuries........should make for excellent sunday beer drinking and snack gnoshing over at Joe Graves' house........

The dream job i wrote about earlier turned out to be a nightmare.......it proved to be terribly unstable and they never came through with the benefits package they promised.........i went hunting for a new gig and they fired me when they found out i was looking........shit!.........i haven't been fired from a job since i was 17 years old.........and this scrub ass clusterfuck of an organization decides to get in the first punch.........well the joke is on those assholes.........because i secured another job the next day.........and last week those bozos called me and begged me to come back.......poetic,no?...........so for now, i'm back at the hospital holding down the emergency room........i have to say, it's been really pleasant thus far........

The baby is toddling all over the place.........and he is great......incredibly sweet,playful and spirited........i am enjoying watching him grow......



Rock it like life's good...........because it IS good here......GO DAWGS!.........

Stak

THIS IS ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW TONIGHT.........

It's a great day to be a DAWG fan................GO DAWGS!.......SIC EM!..........

I'm off to the ATLANTA FALCONS game tomorrow..........God i love football..........


Stak

LYRIC DEVICE..........we're up with GUIDED BY VOICES.....

Yeah I need to do that, that thing that will dislodge the boulder, the abdominal boulder that starts the landslide. Kickin' the dust off the mountain, terrifying the natives, creating history, burying the mystery, waking up the wilderness, with a roar, a score, a trench, a future waterfall, just a kick, the trick, to get a new thing started

yet i reveal this self.... my self down home......at home......in these country hills.........i can't get away.........it resides wihtin me forever.........or else...........refined though i be.....this part of me.........i'll never escape because i love..........what made me..........

twang revealed for upper carolina thangs..........thankin yo granma for lovin' folks....she cooked and she cared and she shared what she had..........finger pickin' parties and hard work made your dad.....

The country made him hard.....and his name made him strong.........your momma took his heart........of that was born you a song......

All night long.........listening ..........listening.........hoping for the best........worrying for the worst of things.......

All night long............it came to this..........the best of things........

The most beautiful of baby girls the world has ever seen............

Best of all things ever,baby.............Tracy is the best person i've ever met...........

Kudos to David Steele and Vivian for knocking it straight out of the park..........

Love my girl..........

Stak

and her family say.........

So when you comin' home? When you comin' home? You've never lived here... We've all got your name, when you comin' home? You've never lived here... We miss you just the same.

We hold your pride in us being here, we've never left off your name, we hang your beauty on our walls, we miss you just the same.

You're one of us, made of the same clay, you mama moved away, but she took with her our name. You've never lived here, we're savin' you a place, we've always held you near, in our hearts & in our name.
Don't forget your name.

Grandaughter of Cat & Jiggs Steele...

T.R.Ipecac.

THIS MAY JUST BE THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN..........holy shit i'm hungry now.........

was that shit for real?.......................

Stak

SOUNDING LOUD..................

Two different posters...........same show................plan on rocking out tomorrow night..........oh and Rhi, i'll have a copy of that compilation cd for you whenever we can arrange for you to pick it up..........i owe you some goodies for the tattoo design.............



Rock it like it's goin out of style.........time's a'wastin..........

Stak

CICADA!!!!!...............

How many of you have seen a living cicada........oh sure we hear them in the trees all the time when it gets hot out........but for me, the only tangible evidence i've ever seen of these weird bugs has been the husks left over after they've molted.......

This weekend at the lake, we ran into this guy..........fresh out of the ground, he was still caked in clay........he looked like a miniature rhinceros without the horns.....Dylan picked him up off the ground and placed him on a pine tree......his forelegs looked like ice hooks........he promptly began climbing.........

We looked up on the tree a few hours later.........and there was nothing left but a husk, split down the middle.........what a strange creature.........

Stak

CAKE FACE! CAKE FACE!.........Aidan's birthday party.........

Yep........we gave him his own cake........chocolate with chocolate frosting.......his first time ever tasting cake in fact.......i think he liked it......what do you think?...........afterwards, i just dunked him in the lake...........he had frosting in each ear hole...........

Rock it like a good poppa..........love that kid to death......

Stak

YET ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF SOUTH CAROLINA'S STELLAR EDUCATIONAL SYSTEM......

Here's Miss Teen South Carolina giving us a Big Brain exhibition............prepare to feel your IQ drop while watching this..........i mean.......GAAAAHHHH!!!!....








Rock it like you've got maps.......locate South Africa and help em dammit....to build up our future.......

Stak

PURE EVIL............i will definitely be having nightmares after seeing this........

I found these images over at My Confined Space which i highly recommend........if you're wondering why i would go so far as to call that "cute and cuddly" piece of shit pure evil, you'll need to go read this.........that should be all the explanation you'll need....

Have a good weekend all..........i'm going to the lake to have a birthday party for my toddler.....







Stak

BIRTHDAY WISHES.........for one of my favorite persons on this planet........

Aidan turned one year old today...........Oh my gawd how i love this kid........


Stak

BOOM!

I have always been in love with severe wheather..........fascinated by it..........


I sat out on the deck today as thunder rolled in surround sound all about me ..........

One strike..........one direct hit......or even an indirect hit..........and you are literally Toast.............

I thought about that one and done scenario............




Rock it like you're living with no fear..........DARE the lightning.......

Stak

DOES ROCK COUNT ON MONDAY NIGHT?........i don't know but imma find out.........

WHILE WE'RE ON WILL FERRELL..........dear baby Jesus...........

I CAN TURN INVISIBLE.........if i really try hard.........

JUST BECAUSE IT BEARS REPEATING..........put yo junk it dat box........

FOR YOUR EDIFICATION............the rhymenoceros........the hiphopopotomus..........

DEATH METAL...........it's the shit.......no really......it's shit..........

THE WINDSOCK OF DOOM..........or a guide to making your bandmates puke while riding in the tour van..........

The photo above is yet another step back in time for me........that's a band i played in back in the days when i had hair..........hair that wasn't growing on my knuckles or my back..........pre-bald gorilla days if you will..........at any rate, that's MARY JANE JONES..........the other fine fellows in the band are Dave Newhall who played bass, Rob Bernier who played guitar, and his brother Todd Bernier who also played guitar.........

Tonight i wanna talk about Todd.........specifically his behavior on the road.........now Todd or "Tippy" as we called him had standards that were a bit different from most folks......let's just say he was comfortable letting his hygiene go way past the point that most reasonable human beings would be sprinting for the shower......and a manicure.......and a sandblaster........

Try going on the road for weeks on end with someone like that...........i triple fucking dawg dare you............my apologies for the breech of dare etiquette........

There was one long trip MJJ took out to the midwest and back........it was a happy time.......we played a record label showcase and gots lots of interest from the VIRGIN records A&R guy............on the trip back Tippy struck.......it was the coup de grace.......we had been practically living out of a van for 2 weeks........Tippy had not changed his underwear or socks ONCE during that entire time span........and it was summer time too..........whilst driving through the OZARK mountains, Tippy took one of his socks off........and okay that was bad.........but what he proceeded to do next will be ingrained in my olfactory nerves for eternity..........he........he.........he........

excuse me for a second........i can hardly bring myself to commit these words to blogdom.............*sniffle*...........

he opened up the side window on the van..........then he proceeded to lift this sock........which for all intents and purposes was a living eco-system of funk......as the sock began to take wind, it became the putrid death wind sock of the apocalypse............the stench of two weeks of foot funk permeated every last molecule of air in the van............

we had to pull over...............

now i've been scared before.......but i have never felt like i was standing at the edge and staring over it into the abyss........until i smelled "the wind sock of doom"..........i hope to never endure such torture again.........

at least it was a rental van............and thank Almighty Jesus.......he used his sock instead of his drawers...........



Rock it like you've lived well..........enjoy your memories......even the stinky ones..........

Stak

TWO TIDBITS.............found wordplay for the Poetry Train.......

Blurb #1

She smelled like nicotine
Stained fingers
Stained teeth
Stained soul


Blurb #2

Your words caress my teeth
I crunch them in my mouth
The syllables are sweet
The curses they are foul


Stak

MAN VS. WILD.............and we didn't leave the set and sleep at the MOTEL 6..........

This is a photo of a vista at Devil's Fork State Park........it's on Lake Jocassee in the northwestern corner of South Carolina...........me and Trix and Aidan camped there last weekend.........it was beautiful............the water was so blue..........-S

It was a nice campground, although if you're camping in a tent you're haulin' all your stuff from a parking lot down a path to your site. For you backpackers, you can call me a pussy, I'm a total "car camper". Plus with a baby, there's more shit required. Once we were set up all was fine. My friend E-man came to join us, he had spent some time up there & was a fine guide. We went to a couple stroller friendly waterfalls, & up to a town called Highland where we got great Italian sandwiches & a $10 accordian. We went swimming in the blue water, had a lazy day, & sat out a rain storm in our bathing suits. I'd definately do it again. - T.

Certainly, pros and cons all around........but the landscape was beautiful.............and we like camping................

Stak

THE LOCAL MUSICAL FAMILY TREE..........this will probably only make sense to me...........

I have had the luxury and honor to be both a participant and observer of the evolution of music in my hometown of Augusta,Georgia..........the picture you see above was taken at SQUEAKY'S TIP TOP..........an Augusta landmark that was once described in GQ magazine by the members of a New York band called Lotion as "a tool shed with a bar on the side"..........they made the remark in the most loving way possible..........because most every band that came to SQUEAKY'S loved it.........Jay Aston from the 80's band GENE LOVES JEZEBEL calls SQUEAKY'S a friend to this day.........for a good long run, it was the oldest functioning bar in Augusta...........for pete's sake, DWIGHT D. EISENHOWER came there for a burger and a beer after a round of golf at the AUGUSTA NATIONAL............

The picture at the head of this post was taken in the late 80's.......obscured behind the cymbals and drums is yours truly.........it was around the time that THE TIP TOP began having live entertainment..........that's my band NEATO TORPEDO.........waaaaaaayyyy back in the day..........the bands set up in the back of the bar at that time.........seeing that pic puts me in a nostalgic mood........so imma run down some of the bands from Augusta that either inspired me,blew my mind.........or of course the ones i played a part in...........(dig my dangle,Bpops).............

i'll start with a band that fueled my curiosity and desire to play music.........My dad's band THE PALLBEARERS............they billed themselves as "the last ones to let you down"..........and they made a name for themselves playing the frat circuit all over the southeast............i was not present for their career..........however........the memorabelia(sp?) i got to see, belied how big time these cats were.........they played white boy soul.........and they released records on two separate label imprints..........they rode the then very influential top 40 of WBBQ for many many weeks just prior to my birth...........and the music kicked ass.............

flash foward 15 or so years to the mid 80's...........as a teenager, i became aware of a burgeoning scene of cats that were doing the whole DIY thing and building the foundation of our music "scene"............

John Brownlee impressed me very early on as a sort of impressario.....he played bass with a band called THE FUNGOES...........and he brought bands from out of town to play Augusta............they held the shows in a practice space above a chinese laundry on 8th street downtown.........there was always a keg..........and the shows always got busted..........but it was cool as shit to me as a teenager........THE FUNGOES later became THE OUTLINES............and it was good.......

there were other bands sharing that practice space..........one prominent band was THE CRAWLING PEGS...........who's members later went on to form BLAH............

around this time, i helped found NEATO TORPEDO.............along side us, several great bands were forming...........taking our cues from the variety of great stuff we were discovering by bands from labels like SST and all the DUTCH EAST INDIA TRADING COMPANY stuff.........FUCKSTICK turned into PAINTED TAMBOURINE......which evolved into SWIMMING GROUND............the boys from TIN SOLDIER eventually joined forces with DAVID BRADBERRY from STAN'S BIKE and ORPAN TRAIN to form DEBT OF NATURE(one of this town's all time greats)........

i joined DEBT OF NATURE upon leaving NEATO............DON dissolved into SMILE.........after SMILE, Dave Newhall and I formed MARY JANE JONES...........and so on and so forth.........up to now..........

in the middle of that span of time, there were other great Augusta bands such as DESOLATE JAMES,BURNING BUSH,JAMESGATE,PINE.........and how do you forget HUNDRED YEAR SUN..............

the list, the history and the chronology are by no means complete.........but the point is this..........this town has produced great original music for more than 20 years now..............

i'm proud to have been involved in whatever small capacity..........

Rock it like your next artistic endeavor may in some small way make history........lay that shit down with the most passion you can muster...........

Stak

THE BOOTS OF EVIL WERE MADE FOR WALKING........keep your vulgar monies..........

All hail E-bay..............thanks to that glorious creation, we procured a DVD copy of season one of THE TICK.........remember............HE IS MIIIIGGGHHHTTTYYY.........seriously great stuff..........

Other stuff..............JOE GRAVES AND THE DIRTY LEFT HAND has several shows coming up......one of them NOT being 12 Bands of Favoritism.............ahem.........more on that later............



Looking forward to a miserable season by my FALCONS............AND my BULLDOGS...........

Baby Aidan turns one year old on the 23rd............i can't really express what a joy it has been having him around thus far...........the work is a pleasure....i have to admit that Trixie does most of the heavy lifting.........and believe me.........the kid is HEAVY...........here's hoping this is the first birthday in a string of a hundred in a long happy life.........


Apologies for the lack of posts lately............i've been otherwise occupied.........

Stak

HOW'S BOUT MY RECONCILIATION WITH MY FATHER...the rest of you just look on,yo........

I can never express to you all............how much my dad means to me..........he has been there for me when i was lost at sea worrying how to be a man sometimes......he was there for me sometimes when i had no idea which way to go.............i gotta give props to Bpops...............that cat knows what time it is...

INDEED...............props to Bpops............

Stak

JINGLE WHAT!?!?!..........JINGLE WHAT!?!?!?.....jingle all the where?!?!?..........

Okay.............so my internets name has been dragged into the media spotlight by the local free weekly paper based upon a debate i was involved in on a local bar's message board........the issue at hand was the selection process for 12 BANDS OF CHRISTMAS which is a wildly popular Augusta charity recording and concert for the Children's Medical Center here...........i was beaten down at every turn during said debate even while i espoused views that i know for a FACT many other local musicians share..........they are afraid to speak them aloud...........and i just can't figure out who's getting the beat down in this article.......it seems to be written with an agenda.........but i can't prove that............it could be that it has simply succeeded in making me look small...........i'm not sure about that.........it CERTAINLY does not contain many key points that were brought up over the course of a few weeks of argument............you can read the article for yourself..........for now, i reserve further comment...........until the dust settles.........messages have been sent to the pertinent parties by myself and i need to wait a bit for their responses............but it's coming...........and hey GATDAMMIT, i'm blogging again..........


And heeeeeeere's the link!!!

Damn..........i've become famous for being a befouler of sacred lambs........COOL!..........

Stak

POSSIBILITIES..............how some pit bulls might bring the future to ATLANTA........

If you had asked me even as late as 3 weeks ago, i would've told you that the likeliehood of DJ SHOCKLEY ever being anything more than a career backup in the NFL was slim to none..........with MIKE VICK'S indictment things have changed quite a bit........it's more than likely that JOEY HARRINGTON will perform to the best of his ability(which equals sucking like a Hoover)..........COACH PETRINO appears to be a no nonsense, go for the throat type of competitor, and as such seems unlikely to allow JOEYBALL to stink up the field for more than a quarter and a half..........

ENTER DJ...........call me a homer, but i believe starting SHOCKLEY under center would be healing for the franchise, the city and the state.........especially if he kicks ass............i have nothing but respect for a guy who sat on the bench behind DAVID GREENE for all but one year of his college career........he could've chosen to go to another school and likely would've started most anywhere he went.......but he was LOYAL...........and he waited and waited and waited......then he took THE GEORGIA BULLDOGS to the SEC CHAMPIONSHIP............

call me silly, but i want more than anything right now to see DJ SHOCKLEY starting the entire season at QB for THE ATLANTA FALCONS............win,lose or draw........get the guy some snaps..........he could be great one day.........THE ATLANTA FALCONS season is already in the toilet.........or should i say "gone to the dogs"......

Rock it like a fan of the game.........talk about football, not fucking PETA..........


Stak

SHIT!!!.........FUCK!!!........DAMNITT!!!............and other dirty words.............

So now the word comes down after months of feverish,sweaty speculation by ESPN and it's mooky hordes of half retarded talk show hosts (read=too ugly for TV commentary)........Michael Vick has been indicted in what is essentially an interstate gambling racket.........at least, that's what the Feds are interested in..........the rest of the country is more pre-occupied with the brutality of the organized dog fighting aspect of the indictment........i could argue all day long about priorities(some folks would take the life of a DOG over the life of a child......and that brings up a whole other set of arguments, because i'm fairly certain that more children die at the hands of their own parents than dogs at the hands of organized dog fighters.........BUT BUT BUT.......that doesn't excuse the actions of organized dog fighters.........misplaced priorities is all i'm saying).........but the bottom line is this...........FUCK "OOKIE"!!!..........SHIT MAN!!!..........finally,finally, finally the possible line up of talent needed to contend with THE FALCONS and your dumbass gets busted for this retarded shit!!!........WHAT!?!!.........126MILLION wasn't enough for you?!?!?!..........if you're guilty of this, you're more than just dumb(as you've been accused of being over and over in the "sports press").......you are RETARDED...........JOEY MOTHER FUCKING HARRINGTON?!?!?!?...............FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK................


Fuck

Stak

BACK AND FORTH............Trixie and Stak.................

Okay..........Trixie and I are feeling especially in love with each other.............so we're gonna go back and forth.........excuse the cheesey love fest...........

Stak: You are my complement........completing another is not the issue........it's more about how your grooves fit mine....perfectly i'd say........

Trixie: I've grown, I've grown to live up to myself, you've helped me to see so. You're the thing I've been looking for without knowing it. You're the climax to my shibang. I found out who I was then I met you. AND YOU LIKED IT. I liked you, from the get go. ALL BE DAMNED.
All cliches realized. All the things I thought people were stupid for. I wouldn't trade it for the world. On a tray,filled with independent wealth. I'll take whatever I get with you by my side. Along with the fact that you love the friends that made me who you love. I'm thankful for the people that made you the person I can't do without. True love that includes all of us. When we fell in love we extended the coolest network ever. I've found my match....You're the best!!!!!!!!

Stak: I miss those love letters that i received at work on almost a daily basis........this is as good...........and although this may be self indulgent, i believe this outpouring of adoration is healthy in spite of what onlookers may think........did i tell you how brilliant i think you are,Tracy?........did i mention how much i admire your artistic mind?..........did i mention how much i think you rip shit up in THE DIRTY LEFT HAND?.............well i think of you in nothing but glowing terms..........i blow up with pride every time i set foot in public with you........and i can barely contain myself when i set foot onstage with you............let's always pledge our loyalty to each other.........oh wait.......we already did.......we married each other.........

Aint love grand..........

Stak

STAK AND TRIXIE.............poetique.............

First line stak: Lovelorn,forlorn British bitten goathead shearshorn

Line two Trixie: Hospice, forgotten, a piece torn for friendship born

Third line stak: Bread broken, carriage upturned, friends truly duly worn

Fourth line Trixie: Strangers be, tried & treed accepted customs queezily

Fifth line stak: Gourge refused from gullet full, forced forth upon sidewalk

Sixth line Trixie: Walk Walk & keep on walking remember this when you talk.



There there now..................


Here's how it plays out without the play by play........

Lovelorn,forlorn British bitten goathead shearshorn
Hospice, forgotten, a piece torn for friendship born
Bread broken, carriage upturned, friends truly duly worn
Strangers be, tried & treed accepted customs queezily
Gourge refused from gullet full, forced forth upon sidewalk
Walk Walk & keep on walking remember this when you talk.

There ya go.................rock it like you have some command of the English language...........make poems,yo..........

Stak

THIS WEEKEND I ROCK!!!!...........

Rock it like you've got incredible taste in live music..........come see my band this Saturday night!!..........

Stak

GOD BLESS LARRY MUNSON.........and God bless them Dawgs too........

The news this week was that long time GEORGIA BULLDOG football play by play guy,Larry Munson will not be travelling to away games this season.........and the rumor is that this may be his final season.......if it is, the final home game will be a sad day for DAWG fans.........he has been calling games since i was a child and is regarded as one of the best in the business..........when GEORGIA games are televised, folks here turn down the volume on the TV and tune LARRY in on the radio...........word is that he is in poor health...........well God Bless You,Larry Munson..........our love affair with you doesn't end this season...........

ME AND TRIXIE FORWARD DRUNK POST MACH DEUCE........dysfunctional superhero draft.........

Heh.......my favorite line from SPACEGHOST COAST TO COAST.........courtesy of ZORAK........"that nanny needs a lozenge".......that said, me and Trix have decided to post a dysfunctional superhero draft..........if you were gonna have a fucked up superhero team, who would you have?...............pick number one goes to me because i rule here...........feel free to post your draft picks in the comments section.......wait for at least one additional comment before posting your next pick........and i guarantee you my retard superheroes will out fuck up yours........

With the 1st pick of the dysfunctional superhero draft, i pick ..........

SPACEGHOST.........Trixie's on the clock.......tick tick tick.........

I'm goin' with SWAMP THING one of the greatest movies of the 80's, first off if you chop anything off it grows back! Lorraina Bobbitt do your worst. Then the hideous lovable guy always touches me in that special place...uhh Brian you're the 1st.

Uhhhhh.......riiiiggghhhht,Trix............for my next pick, imma have to take THE TICK...........so far i've countered your regenerative unit with 2 brutish retards......plus THE TICK comes with a side kick who's a pussy...........dysfunctionally, you're super retard team's ass is grass......plus, SPACEGHOST likes GINO VINELLI..........extra points for me for my team's shit taste in music...........heh...........your pick,virgin...........

Okay this one's personal. WONDER WOMAN. I loved WONDER WOMAN when I was a kid cause everyone knows that when you play WONDER WOMAN you spin around to change from Linda Carter into WONDER WOMAN. I really loved spinning around untill I was too dizzy to stand up. It looks like both Linda & I grew out of spinning & took on heavy drinking. I still feel like WONDER WOMAN when I'm too dizzy to stand up......... for Stak's sake.

Stak's on the clock.....tick tick tick...........

Okay, you've clearly upped the ante,bitch........that WONDER WOMAN pick was straight up a groin shot, being as she's not really all that dysfunctional....except for the fact that Linda Carter is equal to you in the drunk department...........so i've gotta play smart here.......for my next retarded dysfunctional super hero team pick, i select....................tick tick tick........wait for it.........

THE BURGER KING!!!............that's right bitches!!!........i totally saw this badass murder RONALD MCDONALD...........the blood was straight ketchup..........top THAT...............this time, if you're gonna pick a chick, make it a drunk slut like LINDSAY LOHAN...............the clock is now ticking for Trixie..........tick tick tick.........

Alright, this one's for Troma, I was gonna go for the obvious Toxic Avenger. Since he's really a goodie goodie at heart & the only dysfunctional thing is that he works for Troma it doesn't really count. So, my pick to show my love for the Troma is
SGT. KABUKI MAN NYPD. Rough around the edges and kicks ass in a dress, yep its Harry whatshisname for me.

Aiight.........Aiiight.......that pick only strengthens your team.......but i got a counter for your shits............imma have to take TRASH GORDON from SESAME STREET fame.........he would be the only motherfucker on my team with the sense to take the pebble out of his shoe on the planet of retards with pebbles in their shoes.....plus he knows how to pick up the phone when it's ringing.......top THAT bitch!!!!............my team is done........the rest is up to you......

The clock is now ticking for Trixie........look for a blockbuster trade offer from Rhian any moment now..........

I WANTED TRASH!!!!!!!! I WANTED TRASH!!!!!!!!! SUPER GROVER WOULD CRASH INTO YOUR TRASH GORDON THEN GIVE HIS BROKEN DOWN ASS A PEANUT BUTTER & JELLY SANDWHICH!!!!!!!!!

Okay, now that I've finished my hissyfit, counted back from ten & taken a deep breath........ THUNDAR THE BARBARIAN is my next pick, that shit about SUPER GROVER was just to make a point, an angry point. THUNDAR THE BARBARIAN is the blue print for HE-MAN. He also took direction from HAN SOLO with his non-vocalizing animalistic side-kick. I'll give a nickel to anyone who remembers that guys name. THUNDAR fought foes beyond his time does anyone know was that the past or the future? Did the Moon crash into the Earth or something? Anyway ripped thighs & a mighty big sword & a pet who can watch your back. What else needs to be said?


Well fuck...........there you have it..........two of the most retarded superhero teams in the history of retardation.........and i think it might be our best drunk collaboration in the history of retards posting on the internets...........can your stupid hero teams top ours?..........i fucking strongly doubt it,bitches.........but bring it if you got the guts...........the retard hero league of fucked-uppedness will begin competition this fall to coincide with the start of the NFL season(that's for those of you with a decided lack of interest in the greatest game conceived by man).........who know's........maybe we can sell the rights to ESPN..............

give us your picks............

Stak

THIS IS A MIGHTY MIGHTY JERSEY......this 8 will eat you...........*snicker*

I saw this over at With Leather and just had to share it here.......prepare for hilarity because this guy is clearly living in Loo Loo Land.......beware anyone you see wearing a Detroit Lions jersey on the street.......clearly, they are mighty and will smite you with the number 8...........i'm a hopeless Atlanta Falcons fan, but i'm not nearly as deluded as this wingnut......i would never post vids on Youtube proclaiming Mike Vick as a "Touchdown Assasin".........which is worse, a D&D obsessed geekazoid or a Detroit Lions fan?........well, this guy is obviously both.........have a good laugh,folks.........it's on this idiot.......

Rock it like a fan with some sense......wait for your team to put together a winning season before you go around warning the entire NFL of your teams dominance.....sheesh......

Stak

APPARENTLY, MY ASS ROCKS...........is that a good thing?......

The fact that this tag used to say "girl" in the middle is not lost on me...........i'm kind of amused by it..........however, i would like to take this oppurtunity to thank
Rhian as well as the Academy for this honor........even if i did have to show my ass to get it...........

Rock it like a meteorologist.......Rock it like a hurricaine........

Stak

SYMBIOTES...............poetry train car number whatever.........

their destinies forever entwined
the opium poppies
stare dreamily into the night sky
seeing the faces of future junkies
in the rolling clouds
content in the knowledge
that they will meet again soon






Stak

WEEK ONE of MY WEEKLY POWER RANKINGS........a new feature......

Each year, sports journalists engage in the sometimes laughable practice of putting each of the NFL teams in order from greatest to least....the team in the top spot is supposedly the team that will eventually become the Superbowl champion at the end of the season....they call these lists power rankings...the rankings change weekly based on performance.......usually, the teams at the top and the bottom can be agreed upon by most folks.......but things get murky in the middle.........and despite the fact that these lists are absolutely meaningless......sports retards will argue these rankings endlessly throughout the season........actually, they argue about them all year round......it's still 3 months away from the start of the NFL season and these nimrod sports "journalists" are already posting power rankings.......i'm itching for the beginning of football season as much as any average joe, but gatdamm!!!...........

That said, i decided to post some meaningless "Power Rankings" of my own......what follows is a list of things that i think are kick ass(i know, i know it's a blog device...but i've been word-dead lately so it's time to break out of the funk)........

1. MILLER LITE-coming in strong at the top of the pile is my drink of choice.......and it's quantity,not quality bitches.....truth be told, were i posting power rankings for about the past 5 years, Less Filling and Great Taste would've been champion the entire time........extra points for purposeful misspelling......





2. JOE GRAVES AND THE DIRTY LEFT HAND-i play drums in this band.....we rock well.......we got a show at THE FIREHOUSE tomorrow night......you should come to it.......





3. AMERICAN SKIN-my other band......serious ROCK for that ass......the only reason AMSKIN is ranked below THE DLH is because we're in a rebuilding year......

4. SEX-no explanation needed....





5. GUITAR HERO II-This ridiculously fun video game is really nothing more than an advanced version of the game SIMON(remember that one)...except that you get to strap on a fake plastic guitar to play it.........it has recently come under harsh criticism by insecure guitar teachers everywhere.........fuck those guys, this game is a hoot and a half.........

6. MEXICAN RESTAURANTS ON SUNDAY-i live in the Bible Belt and we have so-called "blue laws" which are set forth to force the values of a bunch of Bible thumping fucktards on the rest of us normal people......so you can't buy beer here on Sunday.......but the Mexican Restaurants are open on Sunday......and they never run out of beer..........plus burritos are mighty tasty.......





7. PORN-9 out 10 guys who aren't total douchebags agree.......porn is good for the soul......

8. SILVERSUN PICKUPS- i recently acquired a copy of their latest cd called CARNAVASE.....do yourself a favor and go out and buy it.....seriously good, dreamy shit........the leader sounds like the guy from GRANDADDY..........and that's not too shabby....





9. THE VIEW FROM MY SEATS- i got tickets to the first regular season FALCONS home game against THE PANTHERS on Sept. 23rd.......fuck yes!!!!......i cannot wait.....

and finally.........

10. TOBLERONE- thank Allah for impulse buys in the checkout line at TARGET....chocolate never tasted so good........

There you have it, my week one power rankings.........feel free to discuss or post your own..........these are subject to change on a weekly basis, but i'm willing to bet that some form of beer will remain at number one for a long time to come......or at least until i'm attending AA meetings on a more regular basis........

Rock it like you're getting back on the horse........show no fear.......

Stak